I need help, brothers. I feel like I'm on my deathbed in my mid-20s. All I have ever wanted was a virgin wife to complete me and raise a family with. I don't want to come off as prideful, but I have to state some basic facts about my life so you can better understand my situation. I am tall, white, at least somewhat attractive (I've overheard females call me "cute" on multiple occasions), and in great shape (I exercise often). I don't smoke, drink, and I gave up masturbation a long time ago without relapsing. I have received nothing but compliments from others in the past several years. I have a job that pays well. I consider blood to be very important and as a result I have unwavering loyalty to my parents and other close family members. I have some acquaintances, but not anyone I'd truly consider a friend.
Despite this, I've had no luck in finding a partner. I have attended Orthodox youth events, I go to church, and I've tried at school. Alas, nothing has come forth. I constantly see oafish Slavs (I'm a Slav too, so no ill intent here) in church with good wives. A lot of them have terrible behaviour and commit nasty deeds against their loved ones. It feels as if God has cursed me. Despite my struggle to uphold a virtuous life, I have been rewarded with nothing but suffering in return. If I cannot find a wife, I see no reason to go on. At least Job had a wife and children in the first place. I cannot entertain the idea of being a monk. It is not my calling. My parents are getting older and I cannot bear the thought of living on my own, as I see no purpose in doing so. My faith has been crushed under tons of pressure the last few months or so. I am haunted by thoughts of rebellion and violence against God. I fear that it might be over for me. God bless you, brothers.
God is not required to give you a wife just because you are ‘good’. He’s not Santa, remember that. Do you even approach any of these girls? Do you talk to girls outside of church/school? You also need to get rid of this single=cursed mentality, so go to your priest or therapist and fix it. Most girls don’t care if you’re tall and white btw
Noah Roberts
I'm in a similar situation. I deeply desire a mate and children and God has presented me with several women who like me but every time I come close to a relationship I get scared and run away and justify it by telling myself I'm a no adultery volcel and therefore a good person by not sinning. Why did God make me like this? Even a normie who's a total retard with women but keeps pursuing them because muh dick has a better chance of starting a family than me.
Nathan Cooper
lol Join the military and man up or something user. You worry too much about things too trivial.
I do. I have had multiple close encounters. The latest one was a girl at church who kept coming up to me and trying to engage in conversation. She's had previous boyfriends and I know for a fact that she isn't a virgin, so I kept the talks as short as possible. I have no interest in being tarnished by fornicators. They can find some other partner with a similar history.
This world sometimes seems as if it wasn't made for us. I can't count the amount of "Christian" (cultural) drunkards I've seen with beautiful wives. I try not to be envious, but my God… I can't help it sometimes. It's like some inside joke that I can't grasp.
No thanks. Why would I serve a corrupt empire? Family is more important than "just man up bro." Man up for what? Family is everything. Besides, I cannot willingly harm God's greatest creation. I have only ever contemplated taking my own life, and only to spite God. Eternal damnation seems like a torment to be endured if only for a bit of vengeance for the God who had damned me first.
Christian Gutierrez
Answer too cold-hearted and careless, also contains falsehoods. 1/10, improve your manners.
Maybe you love freedom and independence more than anything. Something to ponder. If so, stay away from women. Everyone deserves a wife/husband who loves them more than freedom.
Garbage answer 0/10
Solid post 5/10
This is understandable, but you must be able to be forgiving to a degree. I hope you find a great match and soon.
Nicholas Barnes
you sound excessively dramatic, like a child throwing a temper tantrum. You have a good outlook for the most part, but im thinking God is testing you for your idolatry of self and of a wife, which you imagine as a prize for all your good deeds ( instead of, you know, a means to stay pure that you may live forever with Christ and all His saints). You are very prideful, and the devil is using it against you to bring you to despair.
Peace of heart is found not in getting what you want, but in wanting what you get. Take time to meditate on why exactly you want a wife (intimacy? legacy? true love?), all pure desires can be found and fulfilled in God, because they are from God. Desires coming from the self, from the pride of life, wanting it your way instead of Gods way, will only lead to bitterness and envy and hate. Seriously try to understand that only by following Gods Will will you ever be supremely happy. You should see it as an amazing blessing that our Father knows whats best for us in spite of our stubbornness.
"sell all your possessions, take up your cross, and follow Me" These possessions include possessions of the mind, that end up possessing us, and prevent us from finding our eternal joy. The sooner you let go of this earthly desire, the better. God knows what you need, what is good for you, you must be patient and let Him grant it to you in due time.
And hey, maybe once you do, youll meet your wife the next day.
Alexander Turner
I can forgive a murderer, but I'm still not inviting him to my picnic. I harbor no hate for impure women, but I don't wish to marry them either.
I do not care about myself as much as it may seem. As I said, I have no desire to live for myself and indulge in pleasure. I want a wife for all of the reasons you have mentioned and then some. I have been at it for years. How long will this test last? Because if I hit my 30s and remain single, God will have much to answer. I demand answers, because I do not wish to be blindly obedient to one who has turned his back on a righteous servant.
Gabriel Murphy
Maybe, but I'd value a kid more than my freedom and I need a woman to get that. I guess the only solution is to find a woman worth more than my freedom which means I have to start looking really hard.
Jayden Green
I know how you feel. Turning the other cheek worked out horribly for me. The assholes who slap back seem to receive most of God's blessings. Sometimes it makes me wonder if the Bible is a disinfo op, because why would God lie to hurt well meaning people trying to follow Him.
Thomas Hall
There are supposedly righteous, loving, virgin women out there, because I've met a few chaps with wives like that, even though they may have not deserved such a fate. A ton of the supposedly pioue women in my church are married to edgy dudebros who just think of them as holes. The thought of that eats me alive. It's funny how they always fall into the wrong hands, yet there I am. I've nothing but the goodness of my soul and all of my material goods to offer and I am decaying. It is difficult to live with. I spend a lot of my nights sitting on the ground in the dark and silently weeping. I try to reflect on what I could be doing wrong, but alas, I seldom find anything.
I feel your pain. It's terrible to hold everything inside. Every day feels like a personal Apocalypse. Try keeping a journal of your thoughts and seek a priest. Mine is of no help, but yours might be. Keep praying, maybe He will help you in time. Read novels with Christian themes, they might work for you. Maybe there is still hope for some of us.
Carter Wood
you could wait until you're dead and then get a wife in the afterlife
Benjamin Wilson
Please stop posting
Leo Taylor
Is this a bait post? If God doesn't want you to have a wife, you won't get one no matter what you do. Hopefully with prayer and mediation you will realise that even if you remain single your entire life, God will still love you. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity. (Matthew 7:22-23)
Bentley Young
meditation*
Easton Richardson
One of these statements is a lie.
Blake Edwards
not an argument
Thomas Wilson
Intrusive thoughts? Sounds like scrupulosity, unless I've mistaken you. God knows your heart, don't allow fear to possess your mind friend, you cannot commit the unpardonable sin. I'd struggled with this for quite a while.
Now you need to remind yourself that God rewards those who try. A wife will not fall out of the sky and into your kitchen. You need to go out and find one. God will do many things but we cannot expect Him to supply us with everything, we are not the Apostles.
If I for example wanted a job terribly so and sat in my room for years, doing nothing to get it, how therefore could I expect it to happen? You must go out there, you must overcome your anxiety and socialize, and then you may find yourself a wife; She won't just knock on your door.
Adam Johnson
I also used to suffer from this torment of feeling God was punishing me. What you need to realize is this isn't Disney. Sometimes bad shit happens to good people for no reason, like, all the time. It's part of our burden.
Keep searching and don't give up. It's better to live with failure than regret. Especially once you realize failure is not a bad thing. It makes us better in the long run, and keeps us humble. Perfectionism is the philosophy of fools. One should strive to make all of what they do great, but not if it costs them the ability to achieve their goal.
Grayson Gonzalez
Just because you don’t currently have a significant other or friends doesn’t mean your time is near; you’re in your 20s for goodness sake, no offense but live a little. Travel, try new things, make friends in your chruch group- do things you normally may not be able to if you had a wife. These are the prime years of your life, have some fun while you can in your free time. Don’t worry so much about women; God will let one in your life when it’s or if it’s His will.
Gabriel Stewart
patience. It's like you think God hasn't heard your cries.
Oh … HAVE you prayed about this? How about making yourself a better servant of God before worrying about needing a fellow servant to work alongside you.
Abstaining from smoking and drinking is not a positive when it comes to impressing women, user. Chicks love edgy jerks, and those are two of the easiest ways to signal edginess (getting a tattoo, riding a motorcycle, and carrying a weapon also help).
Nor is the fact that you have a well-paying job going to help you. That only worked back when women's sexual choices were controlled by their fathers. Women themselves would much rather work and self-support while being pumped and dumped by sexy, abusive chads than sleep with a nice, boring beta provider in exchange for a life of ease and kindness.
But don't despair! There is a way out yet. Mail-order brides are the hot new way for financially successful men to cash in their money for women. Look for an 18 year old (best chance of virginity) qt3.14 from Eastern Europe or East Asia, get married, bring her to your country, and start making babies. Don't worry about her religion; women are herd creatures. As long as you bring her to Church every week and make sure her social circle is composed entirely of Christians, she will convert soon enough.
The catch here is that you have to make sure she doesn't get poisoned by feminism; otherwise she will divorce you and take the kids. Again, going to a trad Chruch every week and attending Church events helps, but you also want to make sure you kill your television and your streaming services; those are pretty much direct pipelines from (((Hollywood))) to her brain (and yours, for that matter). If your wife wants entertainment, get her a Kindle and tell her to read old books (Project Gutenberg is free).
I'm sort of like OP and have self reflected about this often. Where ultimately I shouldn't concern myself about earthly things, but we have all this time here. I don't feel a burden to have children from my family as they are all liberal and or cowardly survived WW2 then moved to Canada. At the same time God says to be fruitful and multiply, but Jesus and Paul didn't. If I don't have a family I can put more time to God, but what is that? It would just be working and being alone.
We must endure till the end. We only serve God though OP. If he told me to do something that wasn't crazy (terrorism) I would do it because I have no attachments. Perhaps this is what he plans for us. And if not then I will be try to be happy with what I have for Jesus is enough.
If you want a wife that badly you will need to learn to forgive. God forgives and doesn't look down on us after. If you can't forgive her perhaps God won't forgive you of your sins which are far greater then hers. Don't be a cuck, but your definition of forgiveness isn't legit and you may be acting overly prideful with that women. God bless.
Yeah that's how it works man. Women cannot be given the freedom to choose their mates, they will always make the wrong choice. There are so few virgin Christian women as it is, and they want nothing to do with good chrsitian men. They want good looking assholes, not your sorry ass. Pray for them.
You have to get out of the system asap. What you desire was taken from all of us by force and defeatism and suicidal thoughts were the desired outcome for it. You can either waste your life trying to find and answer as to why, getting crushed by that very system or gather as many of your loved ones as possible and leave the whole structure of modern, toxic life behind you. Direct your faith and will at achieving freedom and you'll get your chance to meet a female worthy of your affection. The people around you are scared, mislead and on a self destructive path, just like you…but you need to break this cycle as fast as you can.
Jeremiah Gonzalez
Same thing, but it is somewhat literal for my case. Count your blessings brother, and never give up hope. I certainly do not, even with the illness eating me. You are blessed in the sense that most men these days would rather have earthly pleasures with no responsibility until they are old and grey and realised too late that family is what matters, but you realised it with enough time to spare and enough energy and effort to go around.
I will pray for you brother.
You have a friend in us, and in our Lord. Always.
Christian Hill
May God ease your suffering.
Carson Cook
Stop focusing on finding a virgin wife and find a Christian wife.
