COVID-19 causing user to lose his job?

>COVID-19 causing user to lose his job?
>We made this one up. He's been unemployed for years now.

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This was great.

Your thread deserved better, my friend.

make up experience saying you worked at a company that has closed becuase of the recession.

>Receiving a certain, well known, meat filled microwave pastry as his sole compensation?
>A fiction created by our writers, in reality he did it for free.

am i a simpleton if i laugh everytime i watch this clip?

Check

youtube.com/watch?v=9S1EzkRpelY
youtube.com/watch?v=GxPSApAHakg
youtube.com/watch?v=MCT80HJWQ2A

And I'm guessing the virus killed your boss since you won't have a reference?

Of course, he was a nice elderly Jewish man and I pretended to be his son so he had company in his last days since his family were too far away.
Its such a sad thing.

Most of the "fact"stories on this show were probably made up

>WE HAVE TO SHUT DOWN SOCIETY FOR THE 0.01% DEATHRATE FLUERINO PIT ON THE FUCKING MASK

>COVID 19?
>Cops slaughtering unarmed blacks?
>Nope, not this time

Lol

These retards are going to get ass raped in 4 years when feds and state governments catch up on all the unemployment fraud

99% of people who break laws never get caught. Only the really dumb.

>isolation, cabin fever, going stir crazy?
>we made it up, he’s been alone in a basement playing nintendo since he was five

Most people don’t commit fraud against the government.

>only get 3 months of immunity after having the coof

we're all gonna make it

>Have you ever dressed in your mother's clothing?

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>Can a fertilised octopus egg ingested into the human system actually grow inside the body?

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>You think NEETdom is your ally
>I was born in it
>molded by it

Have one of your buddies stand in and pretend to be your boss, unless the job is highly specialized it's unlikely that they'll check further than a phone call.

>A virulent disease unleashed upon the world by a Chinese bio-weapons facility?
>You're right, it's all true.

>Death by strangulation?
>I don’t think so

>Can someone really just walk up to a woman and win her fancy?
>Yes. And you can too.

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>t. CEO of Vandelay Industries

>Have you ever visited a Chinatown section in a major city?
...Yes.

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>tfw laid off from a union job I hated in April
>tfw payout and all this extra assistance cash means I made more at home shitposting with you guys than I would have working a trade I spent two years in school for

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if the company folded how would you be able to get in contact with them?

Take your meds

business filings are all through the states, and during a background check if they or you can’t prove it they just cut you and move on

I love this shit

>A seed and feed store that used to be a brothel?
>You’re right, it’s fact.

Just give them a fake phone number. I've been using a boss from like 6 years ago as a reference to this day and he's changed his phone number and moved to a new state like five times since then.

95% of people don't actually check your references, and if they call and can't get a hold of the person they don't hold that against you, they'll just make a judgment call on you without that reference.

>more people die a year of the flu than covid?
>this one's true

>a similar event did take place
>and by that we mean that in 1967 some guy from rural Alabama had an interview in a local small town newspaper where he claimed to have spoken with a guy whos dad allegedly saw this event take place in some forest
>so as you see it was a fact

based retard

i havent had a job in 8 years

>he unironically believes Matt Walsh

Based retard