Beastars

How would you fix the story, user?

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Remove Melon
Make the highschool setting last longer
More Stands

legosi and louis are a gay couple who kill melon because he eats their platonic friend, haru

Paru should be taken away from her father, he's clearly influencing her too much.

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I'll bite.

Don't pussyfoot and backtrack with Louis. Make him the villain.

>He genuinely likes meat
>After he struggles a bit with lack of veggies keep the sequence where Ibuki tells him to not throw his life away for theatrics
>Have a sequence where he sits at the table and eats a steak with vegetables on the side, causing visible side eyes from the lions
>He starts speaking how he's been thinking and the Black Market has a niche market that isn't being filled: predator meat, and how herbivores and smaller carnivores would pay fortunes for meat from big carnivores; he says a few examples and emphasises lion meat
>Have one of the less important members like Miguel or Hino openly and brazenly question him, while lowkey threatening him with being eaten
>Louis shoots him dead with no hesitation nor spoken words, then asks if anyone else has any objections or idle threats. Ibuki supports him 100%, the others fall in line, and Louis orders the dead's body to be butchered, and to make sure you waste nothing.
>As the chapters go on, show Louis wrecked with fear and doubt on the inside, but cold and confident on the outside. He expands his business while starting to take experimental drugs based on bear hormones -- giving a nice interception with Riz's storyline, maybe add how some 2m+ bears agree to donate some of their hormones in exchange for a smaller/more high quality dose of the supressors.
>Have his encounter with Lekoshi mean more, making his belief on the wolf's hypocrisy be the tipping point to go all out on his fall
>The Shishigumi capture a wolf that was encroaching on their territory. When asked if he wants him dead or just beat up, Louis tells them he thought of something else, and orders him defanged and his teeth kept.
>Don't touch that story for a while until the Riz-Lekoshi story gets midway and Lekoshi tries to get Louis' help. As he finds him, Louis is already deep into some crazy shit.
(Cont.)

>Experimental hormone growth drugs made him a very muscular buck, not as big and wide as a lion, but clearly stronger than he has any right to be. His teeth have been surgically replaced by canine jaws, and while he still has his cold calculating stare, he compliments him with a showing of his new, unnatural fangs.
>The interaction stays more or less the same, in secret, but Louis is torn about it. Ibuki approaches the subject, sensing something wrong, and instead of the losing control bit, he says to Louis that he doesn't have to choose between his old life and the new, at least not in this circunstance. He brought a shit-ton of money and control to the Shishigumi, and everyone in the underground knows not to mess with the Man-Eater. This is the first time Louis learns of the nickname given to him. Ibuki tells him he'd follow him to hell if needs be, and calls him the Pridestalker, leader of the lions.
>The Riz+Lekoshi battle happens as usual, but as Riz gets the upper hand and is about to kill Lekoshi, Louis arrives with his pride instead of alone. He tells them to stand back, and that he will do this. He tosses Riz a knife and takes one himself. Riz refuses, and charges.
>Louis manages to fight Riz to a standstill, making the bear bleed many times over. However, Riz is still a massive fuck-off bear, and in one lucky swipe, Louis is sent flying, only his unnatural muscles preventing a near-instant death. The lions are ready to intervene, but Louis tells them to stand back. Riz gives him some speech about no matter how hard he tries, he will never be a predator, and that he will always be prey no matter how strong he gets
>Louis smirks sardonically, pulls a gun and shoots him
>Riz is shocked, but a single bullet isn't enough and he runs to attack
>Louis shoots a few more times
>The bear goes down, mortally wounded but still alive. He says something about it being unfair
(Cont)

Kill haru
Make legosi turn gay
Make louis realize his feelings towards the wolf

>Louis asks him where was that sense of fairness while he was talking about how he'll always be prey, and shows him his fangs for the first time
>He gives some villain like speech about how for a new age will come, one where the rules apply to everyone, where the weak will learn to fear the strong no matter if they're carnivores or herbivores, and carnivores will learn what it is to live with the fear of having to be devoured alive
>with this said, he approaches the defenseless bear who lost too much blood to put up a fight, gets his mouth close to his throat while calling the lions to immobilize him just in case, and orders him to beg before grabbing his throat with his canine teeth.
>After Riz refuses, Louis bites deeper. Eventually filled with fear, Riz does so. Louis lets go, asks him "I wonder how Tem begged." and before Riz can say anything Louis bites down hard and rips open his throat, watching Riz die
>Lekoshi, who was too weak at this point to do much more than whimper and protest, tries to drag himself onto the horrid scene. Louis throws him some medical supplies, tells him their debt is paid, and walks away, becoming the new leader of the underworld.
>The next plot points focus on a dark and sad rivalry, as Lekoshi tries to balance his love life with attempting to become a Beastar to change his society for the better, while Louis works behind the scenes, trying too to change society much like a Beastar would.

Based gay dubs dabbing on everyone

Have the Beastar be someone who can unite beasts through politics and charity instead of punching and killing.

Focus setting on high school and how both Louis and Legosi are educated into becoming Beastars.

this shit is so bad and hamburger style of writing

Tell Paru to stop and think a bit before writing

A fuck ton better than the overdrawn cringefest that was Riz - Legosi and the complete waste of time that Louis the gang leader

Making Louis be worth something more than a walking meat deposit for Dragonball style powerups/weird crack allegories would be cool. I can't imagine Strongman Fanged Louis looking anything but ridiculous. Then again every character looks ridiculous in beastars, so fuck it

If this means more character drama, proper villains and no jojo moth stands I'm in

The only yaoi I'll take is deer + joker goat

If you don't wanna see a deer raping wolf boipussi you're a fag

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kill the slut, make legosi gay

gased furry

I'm concerned about all those dubs
Gaygoshi might become canon thorugh meme magic

>user writes big block of cool story and actually answers OP
>Lol make'em geeeeeeeey
>Full dubs
And now you get dubs too what the fuck

IT'S SIMPLE- Make them gay

*Yawn* Gaygoshi and Gayouis confirmed, dab and dubs

Remove Haru
manga is suddenly improved tenfold

Bill x Legosi x Louis x Gouhin x Melon after transformation into a furry

check this out

8=33
3333
2=5 reversed
almost hit
confirmed, what the hell, my autism can't handle this, why gays are so powerful today

Gaygoshi confirmed

This. Beastars started as a dark world building exercise, and has devolved into edgy stands. Having a villainous meat-eating herbivore would be in tone

how to fix... remove melon.

>gay pony kills rabbit, cos he resents carno's and interspecies relos
>frames good boigosi
>whilst friends are in disbelief as to legosi's guilt only jack is 100% loyal and through labo shenanigans finds solid evidence clearing legosi
>gay pony tries to kill jack, this time legosi is ready and intercepts him
>goes full carno and brutally mauls yafya
>PLOT TWIST ruh roh pony planned this all along and legosi chewing his ass out is broadcast live...

yada yada some other boring shit i dunno

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imo gay legosi blanco making family with calvaro melon and kira louis

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since you all seem to want to remove Melon so much, any ideas on a better antagonist?

Calvaro melon negro

Society

Maybe give some foreshadowing/establish the Shishigumi a little more before they're relevant instead of just introducing them out of thin fucking air just to kidnap the rabbit.
That's probably it. Haven't read past that yet.

Dog Illuminati. Illuminati that recruited the weirdos to drama club in hopes that predation incidents would happen. Yafya leading herbivore uprising. Ethnic purists wanting to purge Legosi and his love. Juno.

End it after the riz arc

Melon could have been a good final boss.
It’s his interactions with Legosi that’s retarded.
>throws him off a cliff only for a whale to save him
>gets thrown out of 4+ story building with him
>saves him from being killed by a giant skewer
>suddenly gets bulky out of nowhere for the next fight

Louis

No Memelon and half-assed shonenfaggotry.

Gay bara sex for the final fight

>reversed 79 dubs
AAAAAAAAAAAAA