Portfolio rating thread

Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. That seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. This was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle.

Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox.

Edit2: thanks for the gold kind stranger

I'm not gonna tell you which coins to buy (but it's not STA) but you have to make a few risky gambles to go from a $1700 portfolio to something which can actually have an impact on your life. Slow and steady gains is for people with big portfolios

Dafuq?

Can’t you compensate for a small portfolio with patience?

can you help a fucking dick user like me?
Seriously. I have been on Biz for 2 months and still haven't been able to start. I want to start with 1500 dollars.

same question on you my friend

Go 50/50 ETH/XSN like I did

It’s low risk with high gains but they will be slow

Rome wasn't built in a day, senpai.

Excelsior!

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I got ~20k in social security for going to college with a dead parent
Started browing Zig Forums 4 years ago
The rest is just fucking luck and holding

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only based person in this thread