Fun game but lame/cringy story slapped on

fun game but lame/cringy story slapped on.

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>chainsaws for magic ammo
>shoots epic Arachnotron™ weakpoint after lining up shot for 5 seconds while dashing side to side because pro Quake™ skills
>retarded door opening cutscene plays
>"Mhmm....rip and tear.. looks like the Hell Priest™ is nearby.. I will rip and tear because I am the ancient Doom Slaya™
>"Come on, Vega™"
>follows Skyrim™ compass
>Picks up 10 epic fanfiction-tier lore dumps about how badass the Slaya™ is on the way
>Door locks behind the Slaya™ and demons appear
>cacophony of retarded monster noises while the fart synth kicks into action
>chainsaws for magic ammo
>"Rip and tear" WUBWUBWUBBWAMBWAMDUUUUUNUUUUNUUHHHNHUHHH *Uses Flame Belch™ on a deliberately spawned group of Possessed™ and they become Staggered™, does a badass Heat Blast™ and Armor Shards™ fly into the Slaya™'s face*
>chainsaws for magic ammo
>switches weapons 75 times
>dashes aimlessly waiting for a Possessed™ to spawn
>chainsaws for magic ammo
>swings on monkey bars
>performs impse
>250 arena laps and 150 chainsaw uses later the Slaya™ is victorious
>Mhmm.. The Hell Priest™ is not here.. Better tell Samuel Hayden™ about this
>"Come on, Vega™"
>Walks two meters and Alien Queen™ appears in an epic cutscene
>"You will not defeat me, Slaya™, I am the Emperor of the Universe and you are nothing but a Usurper™, the Kar En Kuk™ Council of Elder Alien Space Sentinel Argent D' Nur™ has banished you from the alien kingdom and I will defeat you!"
>Cut to black and level ends before epic boss fight so player can process how epic this is and maybe make a Reddit™ post about it before carrying on
>DUNDUNDUNBWAMBWAMBWAM Mick Gordon farting BAM BAM BAM 50 ACTION POINTS 5 CRUCIBLE CREDIT SENTINEL SHIP ARGENT RECEIVED

yeah!

Wow, isn't that the badass LE DOOM SLAYA!?!? This is so epic and metal XD! le based dev god Hugo and his butt buddy le Marty want to EXPAND THE DOOM POWA FANTASY, uh, yayah!!! Shut up and take my money lmao :P THE DOOM SLAYA NOW HAS EXPOSED BICEPS OMGG!!!!!, I'm getting really horny!!!! Oh wow all wads are canon... wowow omg that means NUTS.WAD IS CANON OMG SO WACKY AND CUHHHRAZEH OMG DOOM SLAYA FIGHTING FOR AEONS OF TIME UHHHH MMMMM YESSSS THE ANCIENT DEMONS SAVED HIM UHHHH FEELS SO GOOD MMMM LORE EXPOSITION IM FEELIN REAL NICE!!!! MY PENIS HAS BEEN MEGASPHERED UHHHH *looks down at his shrivelled member and grabs it with a swipe from the side like an edgy DOOM SLAYUH cutscene* WOW, WHAT'S THIS?? HE STAYED IN HELL TO FIGHT THE DEMONS LIKE IN DOOM 64?!?!?! HOW BASED CAN ID GET?!! *starts stroking and making epic revenant AHHH meme noises* I-IS THAT A FLOATING QUESITON MARK AND EXTRA LIFE IN MY DOOM GAME, UH YYYYYYYESSSS!!!! *hand turns into a fucking mach 5 piston with iron man colors and a snoo decal* AHHHHHHH OH MY GOD HE IS AN ANCIENT WARRIOR AND LE ANCIENT CIVILIATION ALIENS LE ALIEN QUEEN AND VEGA ROAD TRIP THROUGH SPACE AAAHAAAHAHA IM COOOOOOMING AND CONSOOOOOMING REDDIT-TIER LOOOOOOOOORE!!!!!!!!11111 *wipes cum on doomguy amiibo and strokes 3d printed crucible he made from an r/doom tutorial while waiting out his refractory period by dressing up as doomgirl and posting it for karma then getting hard again because he read an epic marty strapon tweet about how mick gordon is farting into a mic for the third time to score the epic kar en kukold dlc*

Story in a game is like story in a porno

Fair criticism

>Story in a game is like story in a porno

That was true about every other Doom game and maybe Doom 2016. Now they constantly shove their garbage fanfiction in the player's face every chance they get.

>a step back in every direction

Eternal doesn’t have the forced cutscenes 2016 does, so arguably it shoves it in your face MORE

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Imagine being so mad that people are unhappy about the Redditisation of Zig Forums that you make this fucking drawing, LMAO

lol doom shiternal btfo

it feels like when this game dropped ID wanted everyone to forget doom 2016 ever happened? i enjoyed doom 2016 way more.

agreed. the lore in 2016 was done really well, it was vague and in the background. in Eternal they just straight up explain it all to you and you don't have a choice in the matter. And on top of that the writing quality dropped a lot too.

fun game but marauder

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seeth

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get laid instead of cooming to porn subreddits you fucking loser

bait

actually this is bait

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disappointed they didn't tie together the story from doom 2016 and doom eternal

at first i didn't think they had anything to do with each other

They're saving it for the DLC. Literal scum EA tactics yet no one cares because le based id, le DOOM POWA FANTASY, RUN A TRAIN ON ME HUGO AND MARTY MMM

everyone in this thread who doesn't think Eternal is better than 2016 got filtered by the marauder

>OH NOES LE FLASHING GREEN EYES ZOMBIE DOOMGUY SO HARD SO LE FILTERED

Shut the fuck up cunt
It's not hard
Just Ballista and SSG combo like 4 times and you win

fucking kek

i played 2016 for the first time when eternal came out and then immediately played eternal. both were good games but i liked doom 2016 a little more, it also looked better imo. eternal ran smoother than a baby's behind tho.

however marauder almost ruined eternal, wasn't a fun enemy.

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only when you're playing one of those juvenile, braindead video games
games for grown ups ar all about narrative and mise-en-scène

But the plot on 2016 was a lot subtle

Hdoom is canon?

i feel like they try to complicate the game too much. maybe people think its "strategic" but i dont want every fight to feel like i have to carefully choose each weapon. i feel like doom isnt really the best shooter for that.

I almost bit that post was funny

>based contrarian Zig Forums at it again

Game fun = bad

the gladiator is fucking more of a challenge than the faggot meme marauder stfu nigger

Apart from the times they forced you into unkippable cutscenes where you couldn’t move, sure

>In releasing the Icon of Sin, you have brought this sacred place eternal damnation
Thanks Bethesda
Does everyone who dies end up in hell in Doom? The space vikings who were duped by the angels ended up in hell, the people they massacred ended up in hell, everyone who died on earth ended up in hell, every angel got sent to hell even though apparently they're this semi-hive mind that can't disobey the Khan with some exceptions, and all the while Hell itself is fucking unstoppable dimension cancer. Eternal was fun, but holy shit the Doom universe is be the worst place to live.

I didn't like either. The glory kill shit was annoying after the 2nd enemy in the game

>>swings on monkey bars

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like 2 times they do this