He's directing a movie based on the last game you played

Nobody om this board can best him in a boxing match.

Scarface: The World is Yours
Try adapting this, esse.

>kemono friends picross
Not even his shady business moves will save him from losing money.

Uwe Boll's Animal Crossing

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Borderlands. It could only be improved by Uwe Boll.

>Persona 4
KINO KINO KINO

In theory he'd just have to make a lukewarm rehash of 1917, but judging by the roughly 20 minutes I suffered to watch of his Dungeon Siege adaption (and teenage me had quite the tolerance when it came to bad movies) it would probably turn out terrible anyway

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Shortlist: everything.
The only movie he's made that is close to the source is Postal, and the movie is fantastic because he's in his element with that kind of thing.
It's telling his only good movies are ones about people shooting everything in sight and not relying on a coherent plot line.

>Monster Hunter by Uwe Boll
Honestly, it'd probably end up better than the Park
Paul Anderson joint.

>Can anyone give a rundown of the worst things he did in terms of deviating from the original games?
With the ~1800 character limit at every post this would turn into a thread on it's own.

Death Stranding already is a movie.

Quick, how do you pronounce Uwe?

In his defence the Rampage movies were actually really good and held up by some decent acting, his cameo was actually kind of funny in the sequel too...
Inb4 t.Bol

Fair enough. Is there anything specific that's hilariously bad to a memorable degree? Like The Room levels of quotable or something? I'm a little on the fence about watching one of them just to find out.

So it might as well be a completely different story, then?

You-way

I actually like Boll desu. Rampage and Postal were great.

Uwe Boll's Apex Legends.

He'll find a way to sexualize every female character, and the humor will entirely consist of racist stereotypes.

based boll

It's literally
>oo-veh

Postal was a good movie

ooh-vey

>Verdun
>WW1 war movie directed by Uwe Boll
I'm honestly wondering how he would manage to fuck it up.
In reality it probably would turn out like 1917, so just another generic war movie that normalfags would eat up.

>megaman zero zx legacy collection
it would be a shitty terminator knock off I guess

Oy vey

uh based

>Is there anything specific that's hilariously bad to a memorable degree?
Not really. That's what makes him so shit, the movies aren't even memorably bad, they're just boring shit. Rampage and Postal are worth watching. Postal he actually manages to recapture the charm and humour of postal 2.

Doesn't matter what I last played. It'll be fucked regardless.

This one

>Dragon Quest
Would it be worse than the movie?

>his only good movies are ones about people shooting everything in sight and not relying on a coherent plot line.

Postal is a high IQ satire about amerifags.
Also, watch his more serious movies, like rampage and Auschwitz

> earth defense force

nice

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>Team Fortress 2
Does he film action scenes well? A whole feature-length film about insane men pelting each other with explosives and makeshift melee weapons could be entertaining to some extent.

Kino.

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Noted, thanks. That's kind of a shame, if they were at least MK Annihilation hilariously bad that'd be worth it.

I reguarly host bad movie nights with friends, and Uwe Boll has never let us down. They're all bad, usually in different ways. The humour is usually really lowbrow, with T&A sprinkled all over the place.

Alone in the Dark - This was our first foray into his work, and it's all over the place. It keeps getting more confusing as the film goes on. Tara Reid admirably refuses to get her tits out for him.

House of the Dead - This is a fairly meh zombie film, but has a few absurd scenes.

Postal - Probably his "best" film that I've seen. It's purile and silly, but it seems more intentional at least seems to hold together better than his other films. Although some attempts to be edgy just come across more as goofy. He cameos as himself in this film, gets shot in the bollocks and exclaims "I hate video games" which got a genuine laugh out of us. Verne Troyer gets raped to death by monkeys.

Bloodrayne - This thing is unfortunately very boring. Having not played the games, I was super excited once I realised it was set in the middle ages (or sometime around then), but it's wasted imo. Meat Loaf shows up as a vampire, cavorting with irl prostitutes Uwe Boll hired. There's a super awkward and surprisingly lingering sex scene with Kristanna Loken. Ben Kingsley hams it up.

>So it might as well be a completely different story, then?
Yes, at most the movies only share the main title. I'd compare it to the times where you had to read a book for class and you only bothered with reading the description on the back. And then you're supposed to describe the strory to your retarded friend. And it turns out that friend is Uwe and writes a script.

>Fair enough. Is there anything specific that's hilariously bad to a memorable degree? Like The Room levels of quotable or something? I'm a little on the fence about watching one of them just to find out.
As far as I remember - not really. Don't treat those movies as misunderstood gems, or works of a mad genius.
If his movies weren't advertised as "game adaptations" they would be just mediocre / bad movies. The kind of pictures that go straight to dvd and get a 4/10 on imdb. They get extra hate from game fans who expect at least something related to a game.
Example: he made a B-class generic moster shooter out of Alone in The Dark.

>Judgement Apocalypse Simulator
Not sure how he'd make a film out of a Rimworld clone but alright.
I am guessing it'll be a straight adaptation, but they'll censor all of the overt occult/religious themes. It'll just be Walking Dead with demons instead of zombies, and it would be kinda shit.

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Of all of them Bloodrayne is the one I was most interested in looking at since I actually really liked the first game, it's a shame that it turned out boring. Thanks for the rundown.

Yeah, that's kind of disappointing to hear but I suppose it shouldn't be surprising.. Thanks.

The most kino thing he's done was the Postal intro scene. Not only is it funny, it's a 9/11 joke on a mainstream movie only 6 years after the fact.