CORRUPTED WISH THREAD Zig Forums EDITION

CORRUPTED WISH THREAD Zig Forums EDITION
How does it work?
You make a wish which you will be granted, but others corrupt the outcome to fuck you over.
GO:
>I want to be able fly

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/qP-2hMNnhgY
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

>I want to be able fly
You aren't resistant to all of the many things that can kill you, such as exposure, pressure changes, thin air, lightning, hitting things, getting shot at, etc.
Basicly if you flew too high you would die because you are still human.
If you flew low you would attract all kinds of negative attention. Also might want to think about investing in a flight suit and parka.
Also because I am lazy
All the stuff listed in this video
youtu.be/qP-2hMNnhgY
My wish
>I wish to be invulnerable
Good luck wishmastering that one.

Hah easy, not even necessary to nerf that.
You grow to superhuman age and all your friends and family dies around you while being mildly weirded out that you don't appear to age. At a certain point people become aware of your super power and eventually you get kidnapped by scientists who want to find out if they can replicate your superpower. They can't but the experiments keep going for years and centuries. The world changes around you without you noticing as you go insane in a cell. Eventually you get out to be that unicorn of a human. Society changes, you see peace and war and the time when our sun expands and swallows the earth. Eventually you get away or get swallowed by our sun - you would survive either way. Time passes by and you try to make the best of it and essentially become a god traveling between galaxies, but eventually every single one of them dies when each of their stars burns out. You will experience the end of our universe when all stars stopped burning. You will be in open space forever damning that day when you wished you would be invulnerable waiting for infinity.
>I want 50 trillion us$

Epic post, fellow redditor. Take my upvote.

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Hey at least I'm trying to do something on this board that is not cuck bait and constant crying.

I know, this is a terrifying concept.

>I want 50 trillion us$
>Immediately after you receive this money, the U.S. discontinues the dollar and replaces with their new currency, the Flurbinek.
I want the ability to manipulate matter. I can create/destroy/transform it into whatever I want.

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Gibe big titty goth gf

Don't you have porn to posting?

You can do that but you have to do it one atom at a time.

Granted, but she makes you dress exclusively in Hot Topic clothes and unironically uses "uwu" and "rawr" in conversations.

Can't be ruined.

Anything you create ends up being spikey and gets spawned in your ass.
Anything you destroy or transform has to be in your ass for the process.
>I want to be a 10/10

You seem to have confused invulnerability with immortality.
I know they both start with the letter I and kinda sorta sound similar, but the words aren't interchangeable.

Also how the hell could someone who is invulnerable be kidnapped or held in a cell for long periods of time?

You're a 10/10, but only to gay men.

Dude that's fucking retarded you're not playing by the rules
>want to be a 10/10
Fine, you turn into a 10/10 and then every black guy in the world rapes you nonstop HAHAHA. REAL FUCKING CLEVER, YEAH?

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Excuse my retardation, you are right - I mixed them up.
Then let me back up: You'll be invulnerable, but lose the will to fight because you have a huge existencial crisis.

Nigger if you're invulnerable that means you're immune to organ failure, so you won't die of old age.

Fugg.
>I want to be able to spawn a really tasty cheeseburger on the table in front of me at will.

Granted, but you are infatuated with a blind girl, so you have to win her over with personality.

>I want to have unlimited motivation

Your will is an eating disorder. You die of cardiac problems at 28

>You'll be invulnerable, but lose the will to fight because you have a huge existential crisis
That is completely fair.
I now must sit and think about it.

I want to be the most powerful human being in the world

Your motivation is limited to the topics:
1) choosing the right color palette for vintage apartment makeovers
2) discussing on Chinese basket weaving forums
3) masturbation
>I want to live happily in a picture book household with my family and children happy until I die of old age.

I wish for mankind to be extinct.

It goes extinct when the universe ends/gets destroyed

You'll be forced to say at least three dumb things on Twitter each week and will be remembered as one of the worst presidents of the USA.
Politics aside: You're Grug from the Unga Bunga tribe, you've just found a large stick that you, as the first human use as a club making you the most powerful human on earth. Three years later you die of malnutrition.
>I want to have a gf

I knew I should have said NOW.

Yup, I'll be the worst by introducing actual gun control and allowing North Korea to be independent while keeping their nuclear weapons :)

But that is fair about the stick thing.

>every time you spawn a tasty cheeseburger a black guy rapes you

If we define mankind as what humans are today it will take some time - let's say a million years for them to have changed so much that technically they're not humans in todays sense anymore, so technically they're extinct.
>I want to bake the perfect pizza.

Apparently to bake a perfect pizza, you need to chop off your penis and dedicate it to Satan.

You can bake it, only to fine you have become deathly allergic to pizza.
Not the individual ingredients, somehow when ever something becomes pizza you are super allergic to it.

Maybe it's still worth it though. I mean if the pizza has an effect like in the movie "the Perfume" - that people go crazy about the scent and would do anything for more it might be good leverage to get power. Power without a dick, but still.
>I want to get 50% off any item of my choice once a day

I want to live a long and fulfilling life

You live inside a picture book and all your family members are turned into lifeless illustrations.

The humanity becomes an all female species somehow still capable of reproducing.

The item of your choice gets cut in half and you can buy half of it rather then the full thing, at half off the price.

Hope you didn't have your eye on any electronics, lol.

FFFuuuuuck
That was actually a good answer.
>I want to have a simple solution to any problem that I have.

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The items you buy will start speaking chinese whenever you try to relax or go to sleep.

> i wish Zona from s.t.a.l.k.e.r was real so i can live there
No way any of you can trick me on that

That simple solution is almost always death.
It however is usually not the best solution.

You get a gf, but she's a gold digging whore who cheats on you constantly and makes your life a living hell. Additionally, she's also "too tired" or "not in the mood" when you want to have sex.

I want the ability to make myself, and anything I am wearing, completely invisible whenever I want, including the ability to become visible again.

You get simple solutions that always create more problems than they solve.

If I can chose where it gets cut it could still be useful. Think you buy a property with a large house on it and cutting the property somewhere in the middle, then taking the house for 50% of the total price and selling it again.

They're invisible but everyone on earth gets the eye of sauron like ability to know exactly where you are and what you're doing while invisible.