Am I even a human being?

Recently had a realization.
Not only do I not have any friends, but I dont have any interests at all. I used to think I was into computers until I realized I dont actually have any computer skills or interests, yet I spent all day in front of one - doing nothing.
I have stopped playing videogames or consuming youtube videos all day because a) Im not even having fun playing them and b) Its an unproductive habit
Since then I realized that I have basically nothing else to do. Theres nothing I want to do. Its like Im on Standby all day, the only things keeping me awake are my schizo delusions.
I have started working out, apart from that I eat and sleep. What else am I supposed to do as a human?

Attached: arm.jpg (450x323, 41.15K)

I am exactly the same, however i have overlying duties that i neglect because i don't feel good, I guess it's normal, maybe try to get some sun on the skin, it can help with the mood.

Im not feeling sad or depressed. I just dont know what to do. Its as if i forgot how to live.

I was like that. You need to limit computer time, it rots your brain (i know I sound like a boomer kek). Its not good to sit mindlessly at a computer/on phone for hours on end every single day.
You're working out, thats good thats the first step. What exercise routine do you have?
I go with pushups, situps, squats, skipping. Added in an hour long bike ride every day and sometimes interchange that with a nice run.
its good to be outside and get some vitamin d, good for the soul too.
Thats pretty much all I have now i'm a wagecuck.

Enneagram 9?

Create art. Craft things. Exercise. Travel places. Take care of another living organism in need. If your life doesn't have value for yourself, it might have value for somebody else.

That might be it. I spent the last years doing basically nothing on the pc, quite literally all day everyday.
My routine is about the same as yours.

5 integrating into 8 and dissolving into 4

Thought 5 disintegrated to 7, from memory. 4 wing tho, perhaps?

Also reading is good as well. Some people like ebooks, but I'd rather read a real book and spend time away from the screen for a change.
Lots of interesting topics out there, maybe start with some pscyhology/philosophy if you need to find a good head space?

Im not an artist, I have no imagination, no really, I have aphantasia.
I dont know what to craft.
I do exercise but that doesnt fill a whole day.
Travelling not possible due to obvious reasons and lack of money since im still studying.
I dont think that would be a good idea. If I got tired of it id let it die without any feeling of guilt.

Im not sure, I didnt look into it that much.

I do rarely when I cant sleep (which is usually the case). I have mostly Philosophy,History and Theater plays. But Id read anything. Usually I cant focus though.

Maybe it helps if I say im an ISTP-T.

>Im not an artist, I have no imagination, no really, I have aphantasia.
Then make art based on what you know. Draw places you've been to. Write about things that happened around you. You just need to mentally stretch out a little to grasp the possibilities you have.
>I dont know what to craft.
Maybe something from a videogame you like, for starters. Like let's say, a simple wooden Hyrulian shield if you're a nintendofag. And once you have that, you can hone it like a skill and craft other things related to it by association. Like wooden medieval shields and such. Then wooden medieval weaponry. It doesn't have to be accurate or even well made if you're doing it just for kicks, though having ambition to improve is good.
>Travelling not possible
Isn't there a park or a lake near you? Check your map.
>If I got tired of it id let it die
Then get a low maintenance organism. Start with a cactus.

>You just need to mentally stretch out a little to grasp the possibilities you have.
That is the issue.
>Draw
I draw like a preschooler and dont enjoy it at all.
>Write about things that happened around you
I try journaling stuff from time to time. Things that happen around me? Nothing.
>Isn't there a park or a lake near you? Check your map.
I wouldnt classify talking a walk outside as travelling.I do this regularly when I go jogging.
I actually had one, and flowers too about a year ago. Neither survived very long.

>I used to think I was into computers
Nerd alert
Seriously tho. Life is pretty much meaningless. No matter what u do here the endgame is still the same

Nothing new.
I still want to do something while Im alive.
I want to be rich and influential and live an actual life.

Not as familiar with MBTI, but it seems like you don't have anything to be stuck into re: Ti and Se (yet).
I also like the way you type- it's pretty much straightforward.
Also, from the way you talk- it doesn't seem like you're in agony over this/desperately need an escape from your situation in the form of something destructive or whatever. I could be wrong, but it seems like you have that going for you.

dont use grammar and punctuation you cant use

>I also like the way you type- it's pretty much straightforward.
Good to hear. People usually take it as me being overly serious.
>It doesn't seem like youre in agony
Yeah like I said. Im not depressed. I just feel kind of robotic. I would almost say my head is empty if it wasn't for the constant noise.

You can send me a corrected version of my own posts via email if you want. Faggot.

you havent given your email but youre using commas wrong to start with
a comma does not need to precede a connective (unless its an oxford comma in a list but it isnt here)
a hyphen isnt whatever you think it is
the a)b) thing is permissible here
youre use of commas is inconsistent as well
a comma doesnt link a main clause to another one
an embedded clause should have a comma at the end
i mean, frankly, your grammar is just awful. I suppose it seems like youre trying and so it could be worse
but dont use a hyphen when you dont know what it does

Yor writing style kinda reminds me of Shane Drinion from The Pale King (a suspect 9). I like that character...
Well, I suppose you can either go externally or internally from this point onwards- externally being going outside/hobbies/etc and internally being journaling/introspection/reflection.
Do you particularly know how you came to be this way?

make others suffer for ones enjoyment, do it economically and culturally

Attached: anti jew plushie.png (500x360, 70K)

Ill keep it in mind when I submit my posts here as a graded essay.
Should I read that book?
Id like to excel in either.
Always been weird. Never had any real interests and a disdain for other people and the stupid stuff they care about since I was a child.
I supposed like said; sitting in front of a pc all day everyday doing nothing has been rotting my brain away.

How? What do I do? I wouldnt mind if its fun and gives me something productive (at least for me) to do.

user I am an ISTP and have felt EXACTLY like you have, i'm doing better now though some days i do feel like that but honestly what you're describing sounds like the "WTF days" or Ti-Ni loop. I don't believe much in the MBTI meme but it seems that we have similar personalities. I just hate this dull modern setting and have felt aimless and dead because of it, it's something that you have to find the answer yourself unfortunately.

Yeah. Sounds about right. I dont really expect to find the answer anywhere else than through my own realization, but its worth a try isnt it?
What made you get out of this situation?

Hmm, why not? You could probably find a PDF online somewhere. Could skip to the Drinion bits if you wanted to, or stay for the rest.
Well, I suppose those two pathways are always open to you. No way other than those, I'm afraid. But if you say you're willing to try either (or both)...
Off to sleep now, gl user ... I hope you find your 'something' to care about that isn't stupid.
For me (INTP), it was introspection + ennea and MBTI. I also (sometimes) nap in the daytime and have cool dreams...

Yeah i guess it is, better than feeling aimless all the time. Well, what sort of got me out of this situation was to try and be in the present more and try to enjoy every little experience i had (which was little to none) , don't overthink things and just do them if you "feel" like doing them. Despite my life being quite boring in general with nothing going on I got pretty desperate and went to seek some experiences because i felt i had to do something. Regardless, this might not work for you as i don't even know exactly how that mindset changed in me, it did take quite a while to get out of it though.

Ill make a note of it then.
Ive been thinking of trying asceticism, maybe that will give me an idea.
Napping isnt an option, Im glad if i get any sleep at night, and if - then im plagued by unending nightmares.
Good Night.

I see.

If you really want to change, you will. Just a matter of time.

Start a garden, read russian literature, study history, maybe practice a language. Youve got the world at your fingertips retard. But honestly theres nothing wrong with doing nothing. Life isnt about being a busybee

Attached: 0AF8FDAD-7134-4007-BE59-D7902C487D14.png (205x245, 7.02K)

>Start a garden, read russian literature, study history, maybe practice a language.
I should pick up some languages again.
>But honestly theres nothing wrong with doing nothing. Life isnt about being a busybee
I can honestly not understand how people can feel that way. I would kill myself instead. Not working towards improving myself to work towards a better future for myself in any way wittles away at my fragile psyche.