Hey user up for a chat? How are you feeling now?

Bad. Exam season's coming up and I haven't studied at all

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I can tell you from experience that in the worst case if it doesn't get better you get stronger more cruel, colder and number to it. Things won't affect you anymore as much as this will go on if it does even. You'll become able to look above all this one day.
Any exercise done today? Got any plans for tommorow?

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Let your worries out on now if you have anything.

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It's super important to talk about it love

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Finished up my workout a few hours ago, useful for waking up I'd imagine. Tomorrow will be more of the same I bet, so I'll break up the usual by going for a walk with my boom box, that's usually pretty groovy.

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Try to bring in some variety

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>You'll become able to look above all this one day.
Yeah I know, it's more of the fact that every time something like that happens the more I'm compelled to just act in an extreme way, I'm not even a violent person but I swear i stared at that sharp knife and weighed the pros and cons for a solid 10 seconds. And I'm scared that eventually it will escalate to a point where I won't be able to control myself.

Scared. Of everything and nothing at all. Someday I want to wake up from this nightmare and be normal but I know that that will never happen. This is real life. I dont like life. But Im scared of death. I just want to be happily married and a mom already. I wish I could have that. But that is impossible. Its not much to ask for, but it is still too much.

Feeling alright, just had myself a Monsty, and now I'm gonna sit down and chill for the rest of the night. Wanna play Halo, but sometimes it's a pain to get everyone together to play it, and queuing into matchmaking by yourself can seriously suck sometimes. I swear I always get someone who goes AFK or just flat out quits at the start of the match, and then the other two players are almost always shitters.

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Not much to be done but work, seems to be that variety is a luxury these days.

I'm aware of that being hard to deal with sometimes those urges. I'm very self-focused and this negative energy can get to me very easily.
You need to find something to do.

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I'm really struggling with college. I absolutely hate it and I'm awful at studying. Every day I wish I was somewhere else but there's not alternative.

There's nothing to do those people will always exist in everyones games all you can do is try being nice to make them understand.
for you maybe. you need to look around to find something that dare I say interests you enough to spend much time into or bring variety into if that makes sense to you.

I have been doing stuff. I have been drawing all day. Just cooked dinner for my parents and brother. Doing things doesnt keep the sad away anymore like it used to.

it can get hard sometimes but one has to persevere.

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get creative in doing exactly those things you find pleasure in. find new receipts, other methods etc.

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It's just frustrating, because I'm doing well, but since my team is awful, I still lose.

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Used to have a few more hobbies, I should start doing stuff again.

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Yeah I focuse on what I enjoy which is single player stories. That's all I do ever. Good to see you're well.

Overall okay I guess. Did some drawing. Getting sick of the world being on full stop even though I wouldn't be doing anything any different if everything was open. I'm still waiting for someone to come into my life and change things up

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Whatever floats your boat friend. You could do those main things more elaborately which is also an option. Do what you want to do when you feel like whenever. Master of your world.

It's not that easy right?

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Feels too late to start being something and too early to quit everything so Im fucked. Everyone seems to get along just fine but I cant. And its been 10 years of chasing my own tail and Ive sunken myself into a hole I dont know I can climb out of anymore.

Everyone who is somewhere right now has something I just dont have. Im not awful enough of a person to cause suffering to get the experiences I missed out on. But I hate myself for never grabbing the chances I didnt recognize were there. Im missing out all the time, late to everything, even the present

Dont have any debt though so theres no real reason to take my leave just yet. Maybe if I starve myself of my indulgences I could marshal some motivation through sheer resentment and anger at people whove done nothing to me

It's not. I'm trying to get people to notice my exist through art because I'm not sure how else to anymore

hi user, i feel like complete shit - i dont have anyone to talk to and ive been playing the shitty old video games i dont even like to pass the time
i listened to some music, cried a bit and generally feel like ive gone back to where i was 12 months ago in the last week or two
just speaking for myself, university was easily the worst time of my life
i wont say everything gets better once you finish because it doesnt and new problems replace the old ones but i have never been as miserable as i was at university
just try not to flunk it because that haunts you afterwards
i think most of us know that feeling
although increasingly i just think i just never had any hobbies at all to begin with

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You have to somehow deal with that so you can make the best out of what you have at this moment.

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