Be me, stupid fembot

>be me, stupid fembot
>try to cook for the first time, why not try to learn something
>i'm old but don't know how to cook
>want to try fish
>set a cast iron pan to the highest heat setting thinking I'll preheat it
>leave it alone for 15 minutes
>put a cover on it so I don't notice the smoke
>put oil on the pan
>it sets on fire
>huge blazing flame in my kitchen
>panic
>remember that fire needs oxygen to survive
>put the lid back on to stop the fire
>whole apartment is filled with smoke, afraid the neighbors will smell it
>luckily I disabled my carbon monoxide and smoke alarms so that the fire department won't try to save me thinking I'm in danger
>it was an electric stove, not gas, yet I set off a dangerous fire in my home
>the fish is pretty good, 6/10

Attached: dumb.png (1176x654, 554.92K)

>be me, dumb fembot
>try make a japanese curry like in anime
>add in all ingredients into pot it smells pretty good
>leave it to simmer overnight to thicken
>wake up and all the liquid reduced and theres onmly mushy potato and overcooked beef inside

Attached: 1574402082253.png (768x710, 268.35K)

Try making sliced bread instead. If you feel confident add some butter. Should fit you better.

>my sister somehow makes a giant fireball hit the ceiling
How do women even manage these cooking debacles

Keep trying. Fembots cooking adventures sound intriguing.

You can bake fish in the oven, it's probably safer for you so you don't burn the place down. Provided you remember it's in there.

Attached: 1585361664707.jpg (2047x1140, 231.36K)

>luckily I disabled my carbon monoxide and smoke alarms so that the fire department won't try to save me thinking I'm in danger
Those don't dial out to the fire department, you retard. They just make a noise when they detect fire.

is your life an anime where you routinely do stupid shit like this? how do i get a retarded yet cute gf?

well how much do you make and how tall are you for starters

I broke my oven, I am too scared to ask my landlord to fix it
Luckily my apartment didn't make any noise due to the fact that I disabled all of them long ago
Don't think I'm stupid enough to entertain you regularly if you really want a stupid gf

i'm 5'1 and i'm homeless
>Don't think I'm stupid enough to entertain you regularly if you really want a stupid gf
you seem pretty stupid though

I don't discriminate based on income and height if you are referring to me

Yeah, I figured it wasn't you too late. Best of luck on learning how to cook properly though, with or without a 4chins bf.

>I broke my oven, I am too scared to ask my landlord to fix it
It's what they're supposed to do, just ask, oven is less hassle to cook things in. Especially since you did everything wrong with pan cooking.

Attached: 1583906580318.jpg (1273x2000, 314.35K)

>Luckily my apartment didn't make any noise due to the fact that I disabled all of them long ago
That's pretty stupid, especially turning off your CO detector. They could save your life.

But how can a fire go off in my apartment? I have an electric stove.
I'd rather never see another human being again for a while and take advantage of covid while it lasts

>But how can a fire go off in my apartment? I have an electric stove.
You literally started a fire in your frying pan and you're wondering how a fire could start in your apartment.
In any case, those devices will not alert the fire department. If they were actually hooked up to a fire alarm control panel, the landlord would have gotten an alert the moment you took a wire off.

>Can't even fulfill your most basic duty to society
If you were a guy you would have killed yourself by now.

>You literally started a fire in your frying pan and you're wondering how a fire could start in your apartment.
Well yes.. but I assume this will be the last time. I've only started a fire 2 or 3 times in total.
> the landlord would have gotten an alert the moment you took a wire off.
I just removed it from the wall and took out the batteries. It kept beeping which annoyed me.

Attached: monoxide (2).jpg (807x605, 93.06K)

>I just removed it from the wall and took out the batteries. It kept beeping which annoyed me.
Because it's not connected to the fire alarm control panel, you dumb nigger. It can't call the fire department.

Why would you say a bad word in my thread I don't like it

Why can't women cook?
There's the whole stereotype about women in the kitchen but they as a whole are fucking embarrassingly bad at cooking.

I just never had to, I can buy food and have it delivered.

>me penis fart
>fart
>cum

this. please, burn down your houses so you have to move in with boyanons

wow you guys the worst ive done is like cook my cookies for a bit too long or cook my grilled cheese on high rather than medium

nice troll post, op

you are so fucking retarded holy shit

Confirmed bait. Not even the most stupid women would have all her food delivered as an adult

the dumbest thing ive ever done was grabbing the handle of a cast iron skillet without a mitt, it was the first time i used one and wasn't thinking because i'm so used to just grabbing the handle of regular pans without using a mitt

I just checked my food delivery app and I've used it 130 times in 1 year. Average $25 meal and $2 tip I guess.

how tf is someone bad at cooking just follow the recipe lmao

lol kys, my mentor in LI taught me how to cook 5-star meals with Walmart cooking utensils, stupid chinks gon chink on their gay ass expensive knives and bullshit

guessing ur a FAANG autist, go order off UberEATS/DoorDash so my worker pajeets can get paid for their Re-Up money stupid whore kys already, drink cyanide

Just look up instructions before hand, they literally walk you through what to do at every step, it cannot be that hard in this day and age to learn to cook.

Haha what a story fembot! It had me hooked the whole way through? Would you rub your stinky sloppy pussy all over my face while I jerk off? Do you live in the midwest? Drop a discord I'll shoot an add so you can share more stories!

Attached: 0149_-_WYr3lct.png (310x326, 28.71K)

I mostly use postmates but ubereats is cool