How do I kill myself and make it look like an accident?

because life comes down to nothing more than being surrounded by fancy material objects until you die. Fuck you, ya jew.

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Barely a cosplay

arent the train tracks eletric? i think it would look like a suicide because you jumped on something that would be 100% fatal

It's that or dying while being surrounded by rats under a bridge while questioning why you didn't actually live.

drive off the road into a something hard while speeding/texting/drunk

that only happens when you are bad at killing yourself, and if you are even bad at killing yourself, you might as well kill yourself

Just go hiking and "slip" off a cliff. Its that fucking easy you dumb faggot.

bad idea user, if you dont hit you head in the crash you could be alive but with severe pain and months of therapy

i think this is the best one so far, the odds of survibg is almost 0, if op really wants to simulate an accident he should do selfies during the hike

Fatal single driver crashes are pretty much always assumed to be suicides.

just take some friend with you then and make them wear a seatbelt

carbon monoxide poisoning

Go to the most black/ghetto neighborhood you can find and shoot yourself. It’ll get counted as gang violence. You’ll be dead and get a bunch of niggers arrested, it’s a win-win.

yeah but op wants to make it look like an accident how do you do that nigger?

If OP is the family retard then it’d be completely believable he’d somehow end himself so stupidly.

make chemistry appear to be a hobby, start locking the doors to your room at night, do a reaction that makes carbon monoxide as a byproduct

thats actually a really good one. high concentrations of CO kill quickly

researchgate.net/post/how_can_i_generate_carbon_monoxide

Dont do it though, OP

Get a pilot's license, rent a plane, point it in a rural direction, trim it a bit nose high, and take a nap.

well, given the fact that you are a bfag you are too stupid to think of a way to do it yours. so convincing people that you might be dumb enough to try to pet a lion or see if something is loaded by looking down the barrel or even leaning over the side of a hot air balloon to see better while holding your hand over your eyes and wearing a baseball cap backwards are all valid. but if you must, the most convincing is a family event while drunk falling and hitting your head is best. no hesitation, just sweet blinding release. your welcome. personally i have chosen the longest and most painful death. knowing that every moment i spend "being productive" only supports a temporary comfort and serves to fill everyone else's pockets. how people live their lives buying status symbolistic garbage that has 10 percent of it's original "value" after 10 years (that is a long time to most of these idiots) and how it has little practical application and will be sent to landfill after it is tossed.that children will be taught the same stereotypical filth generation to generation as we overwhelm our own bodies with synthetic foods till we die of chemical leeching. in case i dont see you good evening good night and good luck

i forgot to post pic

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if you actually want to kill yourself you need to do some research

the info I have is about 5 years old so. anyway its hard to research how to fake your death because the people who do it successfully are presumed dead. So how do you research it? find people caught on a technicality. First and foremost, no boating shit. they immediately investigate boating shit.

Step one: start phasing off the grid. get cash put shit in your wife's name or a trusted loved one et cetera
step two: make it a habit to start forgetting your phone, make it look realistic you wouldn't have it on you.
Step three: go camping, never come back. maybe set up a new ride at a different campsite you can use, get a different identity beforehand idk but tons of people go camping or hiking in national parks and are never found. people won't blink twice and think you got eaten by a bear or something.

Step four: Welcome to your new life. you can never contact people from your old life, unless they're in on it. never. with facial recognition prominent if you have had a photo taken of yourself you may want to get plastic surgery or a tattoo that will throw it off. Don't be seen in public photos. change up your look so if you are you won't be recognized. you need to let your old life burn away and life your new one. congrats, you're technically dead

why does it need to be accidental? you're gonna kill yourself so nothing would matter

1. apply fuckton of spray tan
2. go for a jog in the park
3. ???
4. profit

question is how to hide the canister etc. How are you going to convince people you accidentally had a large canister of nitrogen and let it fill up a tiny space you crawled into?