Zig Forums plays cyberpunk

Reveal my 60 inch cock

Offer to pay him five dollars to break the loop

so what now?

Look man, I'm just doing what I'm good at here. We have a dynamic, I break things and schmucks like you come to fix it

"Well, shit. Do we have to summon Shazam or something?"

> You use your one phone-a-friend to help you get out of the loop.
You call your only friend to help you.
"Gwen! Time is frozen, I'm being attacked by a man with a moustache!"
"Correction. I am not attacking you. And by the way, she can't hear you. Time is frozen."
"Fuck!"

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shit my pants and cry

melt time

Wait, Frozen. That's right. Let's sing Let it Go

begin masturbating furiously while making caveman grunts

You realize that after all this time you still haven't COOMED yet.

Grab his hand and use it to fist my own asshole until i bleed

Try to get help by asking in Yahoo answears

kneel and cry myself to sleep

suck his cock

> You begin masturbating furiously while making caveman grunts.
Before you can finish, you hear an ungodly screech. It is impossible to describe, and nearly makes you go insane.
"What the fuck is this?"
"A timebug. They will kill you in order to correct the flow of time. Follow me if you want to stay alive."

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Tell him that time is a lie made up by corporations to sell more clocks

continue masturbating without a care in the world

That's fucking it, I'm calling the time cops.

Shut the fuck up you pussy ass bitch I can take on a fucking timebug

eat the bugs bigot

You hail a cab with an appropriate "no timebug" bumper sticker

cum on the timebug

Summon the Time Force rangers

> You tell him that time is a lie made up by corporations to sell more clocks.
The man looks at you with a strange look in his eyes.
"You're a smart guy, aren't you?"
"I try."
The screeches are approaching. You can't even begin to imagine what a timebug looks like.

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EAT
THE
BUGS(NAX)

ask him what we do to escape the timebug

Use the console to enable god mode and give myself a 600 inch cock empowered by the power of zeus

freeze the frozen time

turn into sonic the hedgehog and fight eggman

summon the unabomber to kill the timebugs

ask him how this is supposed to advance the plot

Summon the Quantum ranger

Become a timebug and mate with the queen

Take a good look at the timebug

Pull my pants down and start fisting myself, it is the timebugs weakness

> You ask him how this is supposed to advance the plot.
"Don't you see? The timebugs attack linearly. Dodging them now would be a rookie mistake. In order to avoid timebugs, you need to dodge them non-linearly. Like, in the past. That's what we did three years ago."
"What?"

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press enter (no input)

CHIM into a new timeline

go back 3 years in time to the 23 man gay orgy we participated in

You shout KINO

You say "fuck this bullshit" and sign your invitation to the Library, time to get some books.

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What happened 3 years ago?

I understand now. The timebugs were the memories we had along the way.

"I went back in time three years ago to save you from the attack that is happening now. Because that is how you deal with timebugs. Now shush and watch."
Suddenly, the screeching stops. You feel like all danger is gone.
"We are safe for now, but the timebugs will be back. We need to do something."

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Fuck off Angela

We’re going to the brothel

ask him how we can deal with timebugs in the present

Morph into a time force power ranger

Do:Cast a robot spell that makes Buckyfag appear and then he starts fucking the time bugs causing you to be sent to the future where its a void city populated by the children of buckyfag and the time bunger bug things

Stop time to have more time to think about what to do

Have you tried eating the timebugs, bigot?

Freeze time again hoping it will stop the timebugs.

> You ask him how you can deal with timebugs in the present.
"Time is like a grain of sand, rolling around in an endless stream. You need to destroy the past so that the time cannot be returned."
"What?"
"I am talking about killing your self past. It really is the only way. And only you can do this."

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kill the past

Kill your future self instead

Go back to 1945 and fuck Hitler’s dead corpse

Aren't you the cock master or some shit? What about I kill you in the past.

kill my self past

Kill our past. But not our past self. That would be ridiculous.

Seven minutes is all I can spare

What if we turn time into a grain of rice instead?

Pin him down and shit on his face

Wait a second! whats your true name clockmaster?

> You kill your self past.
Trusting the advice, you go to the past and find your past self taking a walk.
You point your xore blaster to him, but before you can shoot, another version of yourself appears and pins you to the floor.
"Stop! You must listen to me! You're being fooled! Don't trust the clockmaker!"

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Sudaaaaaaa

you hesitate for a moment, only for your past self to suddenly strike!

Ask if I can trust the timebugs

ask him what is going on

have sex

Have sex with my past self

the clockmaster?

Attempt to shoot the clockmaker

Reveal that you tricked your future self into being under the impression you were going to kill your past self, but the reality is you were going to kill your present self, and another you appears and shoots himself in the head

"I'm going to kill myself and you're not stopping me again this time"

> You ask him what is going on.
"I am you from the future. The clockmaker is a fraud. He is more evil than anything you could imagine, and he is trying to kill us. Timebugs don't exist, he fooled you with a holoshow!"
You are not sure whether you can trust yourself or not.

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/story Clockmaster's POV:

Do:Cast a robot spell that makes Buckyfag appear and then he starts fucking the time bugs causing you to be sent to the future where its a void city populated by the children of buckyfag and the time bunger bug things

pull your pants down to your knees

ok so I gotta kill this cockmaster?

Prove that I can trust you by sucking my cock dry

Say: You could be another holoillusion. Maybe I should shoot you to be sure.

Impregnate your past self