/lit/ here

Use Microsoft Word 2018 on Windows 10: Professional edition

vim's own spellcheck, you could you just write as is and get away with it

Microsoft Word's grammar checker actually isn't particularly good, people mostly just assume it's correct: serenity-software.com/pages/comparisons.html

OP is looking for much more unfortunately, he wants a grammar checker which is orders of magnitude more difficult to create, and orders of magnitude more difficult beyond that to create well. Personally this is more or less what I do as well though.

How in the fuck do you compile this shit? Even after installing the 1000 java dependencies, it still fails to compile.

I'd just use the build script (probably on the latest release version) personally.
To install or build using a script, simply type:curl -L raw.githubusercontent.com/languagetool-org/languagetool/master/install.sh | sudo bash sudo bash install.sh Usage: install.sh Options: -h --help Show help -b --build Builds packages from the bleeding edge development copy of LanguageTool -c --command Specifies post-installation command to run (default gui when screen is detected) -q --quiet Shut up LanguageTool installer! Only tell me important stuff! -t --text Specifies what text to be spellchecked by LanguageTool command line (default spellcheck.txt) -d --depth Specifies the depth to clone when building LanguageTool yourself (default 1). -p --package Specifies package to install when building (default all) -o --override Override automatic OS detection with -a --accept Accept the oracle license at java.com/license. Only run this if you have seen the license and agree to its terms! -r --remove Removes LanguageTool install. uninstalls the dependencies that were auto-installed. (default partial)Packages(only if -b is specified): standalone Installs standalone package wikipedia Installs Wikipedia package office-extension Installs the LibreOffice/OpenOffice extension packageCommands: GUI Runs GUI version of LanguageTool commandline Runs command line version of LanguageTool server Runs server version of LanguageTool

That's what I did! JAVA_HOME went unset and maven isn't able to find a compiler.

ah sorry, that is odd, you should be able to do something like the following:
JAVA_HOME=jdk-install-direxport JAVA_HOMEPATH=$JAVA_HOME/bin:$PATHexport PATH

~$ env|grep JAVA_HOMEJAVA_HOME=/usr/lib/jvm/java-8-openjdk-i386/~$ sudo bash install.sh -b -p standalone[omitted text][ERROR] COMPILATION ERROR : [INFO] -------------------------------------------------------------[ERROR] No compiler is provided in this environment. Perhaps you are running on a JRE rather than a JDK?[INFO] 1 error
Am I doing something wrong? Is java just hopeless?

could you check to see if $JAVA_HOME is in your $PATH? other than this I'm not sure what could be wrong.

I did, of course. Eventually I figured that the new instance of bash wasn't receiving the environment variables for whatever reason. So I did, ~$ sudo bash -c "export JAVA_HOME=/usr/lib/jvm/java-8-openjdk-i386;export PATH=$JAVA_HOME/bin:$PATH;. install.sh -b -p standalone"
One problem was solved; maven no longer warned that JAVA_HOME was unset. The original compilation error from still appeared, though. I'm giving up while I still can.