Congratulations, oh most insufferable of generations – against all odds and confounding the experts, you have still somehow managed to make yourselves even more annoying. Apparently, the hep new jive among your tiresome cohort is “Democratic Socialism,” resurrecting a poisonous nineteenth-century political death cult and putting a kicky new spin on it to make it palatable for the suckers. It’s the political equivalent of hipsters who insist vinyl records are superior because they didn’t grow up forced to crank their tunes on that miserable format.
The “Democratic” part is some cunning rebranding. Just stick “Democratic” in front of something awful and it’s good-to-go. “Democratic haggis”? Yummy! “Democratic herpes”? Sexy! “Democratic Nazism?” Hey, what’s the difference? National socialism, democratic socialism? It’s really just a question of who runs the camps because regardless of the particular brand of socialism, there are always camps.
Always.
That these millennial Marxoids lack personal experience with socialism does not stop them from embracing it. After all, socialism’s biggest fans are always the people who aren’t trapped inside it. Remember the progs who always fly down to Havana and/or Caracas to party with the local caudillo? They always fly home again.
Today's millennial socialist dilettantes might consider consulting with some of us who have personal experience with this ideological cancer, but millennials tend to prefer to rely upon their arbitrary feelz rather than on boring old facts, evidence, and history.
What the boring old facts, evidence, and history demonstrate, beyond any rational dispute, is that socialism is a bloodstained abomination with north of 100 million corpses to its accursed credit. The It Girl of the current commie/Democrat daisy chain, wide-eyed half-wit Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez, doesn’t let bourgeois concepts like “knowing things” stop her from sharing her sophomore-grade insights all over the left-wing media, which is to say “the media.” Gulag Barbie is a clown, and even the late nite hack hosts stare back at her adolescent babbling, amazed as she tosses an incoherent word salad about her workers’ paradise.
Why, it will be just like Switzerland. Or Sweden. One of those. Like, are they different?
By the way, that’s satire (Def: “trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly”) in case you are, like her, too dumb to tell.
No one loves socialism quite like a moron who has never experienced it firsthand. No one hates it like someone who has seen it up close. I walked around in its ruins overseas; it’s an abattoir. My wife escaped it, though her granddad didn’t – he rotted in Castro’s prisons for nearly two decades because he refused to play ball with the reds. Then he died. Oh well, gotta break a few eggs to create a paradise where somebody else pays for your college, right?
Just remember that you are an egg.
The free stuff thing is a really big part of what today’s “Democratic Socialism” is –getting the leftist government to send people with guns to take the stuff you’ve worked for and give it to the people who like socialism.
Free college? Well, free for the people who vote for the democratic socialists.
Free healthcare? Well, free for the people who vote for the democratic socialists.
Free whatever they decide they want for free next? Well, free for…you get the idea.
Three guesses as to who gets stuck with the check for all this free stuff, because someone always gets stuck with the check because there is no such thing as free stuff. All those millennial mommies who read their theybies that insufferably stupid kiddie book The Giving Tree implanted the dual notions of entitlement and economic illiteracy into their useless spawn. The promise of socialism is that someone else will do the toiling – and that someone is always the people who reject socialism.
