After seeing the new social media fad out of Russia and China where rich people flaunt their wealth by "falling" out of their cars, combined with this deep emptyness and lack of belonging to anything (nothing means nothing), I can see why disaffected people drift left. Conservatism is traditionally tied to unrestrained capitalism, and yes, communism is its own brand of insipid, but nothing beats the aching emptiness many men come to feel when they see through the shiny plastic people and toys.
Communism almost seems preferable to this. Of course, unfathomable millions were killed during red purges, but the alternative is today, where these boomers and neo-boomers go around, shitting microplastics, buying disposable vehicles, happily paying rent or mortgage on particle board hellholes, engaging in meaningless vanity as a distraction from the finite nature of this worldy existence…
I am not proclaiming anything exceptionally good about any political and economic system. I am just saying, arguing left vs right is so pointless. It is why I left 4chan Zig Forums, those people are cowards set on LARPing until they retire as neo-boomers, doing their part to shit up the planet and carve out their own chunk of urban dystopia, riding lawn mower and (((sips))) included.
Maybe i am just feeling more disaffected than usual. But i have had this feeling since I was a kid. Seeing a walmart store and imagining the wage slaves inside, spending their days and nights under artificial lights and selling sorry excuse for food. Think of all the various types of the same food boxed in BPA or some other estrogen-cancer causer. All the farms got choked out, the orchards got mowed down so people could live in literal particle board cardboard boxes. My boomer parents are dully indoctrinated.
I dont know. I feel like i cant handle it anymore. I feel at the end of my rope. I cant find any peace without heading far outside of town, even then i have to pick spots that arent excessively polluted, or where the pulpmill sulfur stacks dont waft down to me that day, try to swim upriver of the sewage plant.
Nothing makes me sadder lately than the sound of morning traffic starting up. Watching people go to work. A man stood on the bridge today and police were there, lights flashing, trying to sfop him from jumping off. People were inconvenienced on their way to work. I stopped to maybe go help him but it was all over by then.
Somebody please tell me something good. Wouldnt living on a commune farm be preferable to this? I feel like it has finally dawned on me. If we keep going this way, this is it. I either participate in this clown world and hope for the meaningless material gains, or i opt out. If i opt out i expect to experience real freedom before i am invariably crushed, because we know the system will not tolerate me in my nearest to natural state.