Doughnuts in stick form: Dunkin' debuts Donut Fries

nope lol

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This board would be dead, boring and completely Zig Forums-tier & Zig Forums-tier without Johnny Neptune. That's just a fact.

But I want to grind out another week of commenting on the story about the yakuza man stealing watermelons.
Fuck Jimmy Neutron!

DUNKACCINO

or another – he does not like the idea of "containment".

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Is this a new form of crabposting?

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Nah.
Just shitposting.

Areent those Churros?

Why did JN stop tripfagging?

Because you're retarded and need to pay attention. Less shitposty answer would be that the hotpockets enforced anonymity.

Do you see a namefield?
Also, JN was never a tripfag. Just a raging namefag.

JN looks like he has seen some shit. He should try the movies.

fuck off manlet

This, I used to falseflag as him and say he loved drinking cumlube from dragon dildos. He probably does but it was still funny.

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I see Loss.

Don if that's you, your obsession with Loss appears worrisome, u ok?

Looks like a Neptuneless day on all threads today!
so far

Oh well.
HAPPY CATURDAY
Anyway!
You too, Jim.

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Nah. He's blowing up the upskirt shoe camera explosion thread, talking to himself while drinking coffee and vaping nasty fruit flavored shit.

Johnny Neptune Incoming!

Here's Johnny!

Where's Johnny?

We've already had donut sticks for like forever though.

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GAWD DAYUM!!

I can't believe I didn't realize this thread existed….

Even more importantly, I can't believe I didn't realize Dunkin Donuts is making 'donut fries' now!!!

…. That sounds like a delicious way to extort $100 from a manager and go to jail…..

….. In fact, next time that I come up with a harebrained extortion caper, I'm going to be sure to order the donut fries first !!!

There's nothing wacky or harebrained about trying to finagle some delicious donut fries next time I'm extorting a Dunkin Donuts restaurant

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I'm on my way down to the local Dunkin Donuts as we speak, and I've taken the liberty of writing out an informal agreement not to pursue civil litigation if the donut fries aren't absolutely delicious if the donut fries aren't absolutely delicious!

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Lel!

Of course we all know hindsight is 20/20….. That goes without saying….

Because a fucking NIGGER shift manager bitch at the Dunkin Donuts actually STOLE MY PHONE right off the table when my back was turned and I was talking to my wife, and when I had Wendy call the Sheriff's Department to report the incident and get the security cam video, she actually broke the screen of my phone throwing it into a garbage can trying to hide the fact that she had stolen it…. Of course I was pissed off that I had to pay the $100 repair fee for the screen….

….. I went to the offices of Dozier Law Firm, and consulted with David Dorer, a staff attorney who handles civil and criminal cases….

I went over the entire case with Mr. Dorer, who assured me it was completely legal to attempt an out-of-court settlement before taking them to small claims court.

….. Of course, taking them to small claims court was more of a hassle then I wanted, and my real goal was to Simply demonstrate that I wasn't joking around, and I was prepared to go to small claims court over the matter….

All I wanted was for the general manager of the restaurant to assume the responsibility, because after all one of his employees damaged my phone while trying to steal it while she was on duty….

20/20

of course it is……..

If I knew then what I know now, I would have simply said "forget it, I'll pay the $100 to repair my phone and consider it a loss"

of course I would have…………..

But I had no way of knowing what was going to happen, and I had no reason to believe a miscarriage of justice would occur…… In fact, I specifically went by the Dozier Law Firm on the way to the courthouse, for the sole purpose of double checking and making sure it was legal to proceed with my plan…

According to the attorney, this is done everyday, and he told me, "we always recommend people try to settle out of court before filing the papers in the courthouse."

….regrets ?…….

Sure…. Hell yes I have regrets ….
But not so much about the phone incident… I regret tons of bad decisions I've made in my life, situations where hindsight was 20/20, errors in judgement I would not have made if I only knew what was going to happen in the long run…

I've made hundreds and hundreds of fucked-up decisions in my life.

this one?…. It was one of the most minimal bad decisions I've ever made, and I actually put more effort into trying to avoid a problem regarding my phone then I usually put into other bad decisions I have made in my life

….. In fact, in many ways the situation with the phone turned out to be kind of 'positive'….

Subsequently, a lot of really good things have happened for me revolving around the case.

As the low-IQ inmates say, "it is what it is"

Pick me up some gluten-free savory donut fries while you're there.

I don't like sugar or gluten.

...

LOfuckingL

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But these are deep-fat-fried and don't contain enough preservatives to keep them on the shelf for several years.

It's important to note that the phone that STUPID NIGGER BITCH broke was a 6" 1080 dpi 32 gig internal memory 256 external memory USB type C Qualcomm 2.0 fast charging Snapdragon 820 octa-core processor bad ass mother fucking phone…..

I use my phones as mobile art music and video Studios…

I have paid versions of Adobe Photoshop Touch, FL Studio Mobile for Android, and Kinemaster on my phones.

I do NOT do Facebook or Snapchat or Instagram or Reddit.

I very rarely ever even use my phones for texting or phone calls.

I shit post, sure… Sure I do…
I've been addicted to making people unhappy online for more than two and a half decades now…

And Zig Forums is just my latest in a long line of online venues did I find pleasure making people unhappy………

But I look at my phones as an ongoing experiment of mobile video music and graphic design capabilities, having picked up where I grew bored on computers.

So HELL YES I WAS PISSED !!
You better believe I was pissed off
I was fucking furious!!

The thing that pissed me off the most: the general manager didn't fire or reprimand the shift manager who tried to steal my phone, or the other employee who helped her.

So yeah….. I was fucking pissed….

(But nowhere near as pissed off as I am about not having tried the new donut fries yet)

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I don't know how long you were in the time warp thread I archived yesterday (the archive link is in the first post of this thread, but does not contain your shitty finger); but I stated in a couple long blogs that I may soon be exiting this site and moving on with my life away from pseudonymous image boards as I am getting bored, etc… I will phase out this part of my life soon. The blogposts are worth reading, and the last few posts after the mod came on to inform us why he anchored it are slightly humorous.
I wonder how soon this one will get bumplocked and what excuse will be given. This is REAL News! Oh well, there's always the shellfish thread to run up to the bump limit!
Anyway, if you do try the donuts, let us know how they taste.

I'm also contemplating exiting stage left very soon as well

The planets are just lined up in such a fashion as to facilitate a transition like this… It's just the right time….

Not tonight….

But soon…..

(I'm so pissed off right now because I just called the same Dunkin Donuts where the girl tried to steal my phone, and I recorded a hilarious conversation where I asked the stupid bitch about the donut fries)

……. But the call recording was messed up, because I didn't take the time to check the levels first, and the only thing it captured was me talking, and it didn't get her talking to me at all……

(It's really too bad because it was pretty God damn funny. I told her how fucking amped I am about the new donut fries, and when she told me they didn't have them at that location yet I got very upset, and I started demanding that she tell me exactly when they would be available so I could be there first thing in the morning)

She's a nigger, so of course she didn't understand what I was doing, and I actually told her that I wanted her to save my phone number and call me immediately as soon as the shipment came in so I could try these donut fries …

(and the stupid nigger actually JUST CALLED ME BACK to inform me that they would be available first thing Monday morning. I asked her exactly what time the restaurant opens, and she told me 5 Sharp… I told her I would be there at 5 a.m. Amped and ready to go. I told her to have several orders of donut fries ready for me when I got there)

….. And she tried explaining that she wasn't going to be there Monday morning, so I told her to leave a note for the shift on Monday morning telling them to have some goddamn donut fries ready for me….

(And the goddamn call recorder didn't have the levels set correctly so I was unable to get a quality recording and upload it to YouTube)

SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!

I think it's a very good idea that we should both focus on other things, because we can always come back here and irritate people at a later time, but there are more important things for us to be working on right now

SHIT!!! SHIT!!!! SHIT!!!!

God dammit that would have been an amazing video

I can't believe I was so careless that I didn't check my levels first

Rocket was 'dumped off' by somebody, and just appeared without any siblings. Just her.

she was following the teenaged girl with the injured leg (who a neighbor trapped recently) but Rocket was NOT the kitten of the teenager. She simply joined up with her after being dumped off and started following her everywhere

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But because Rocket has no siblings here with her, she's going through the learning stage (learning how to fight and kill and be a cat, the ultimate killing machine) by herself……

Of course, kittens usually go through this stage together, using each other as practice dummies as they learn how to leap and attack and fight and kick and scratch and do all of the crazy amazing gymnastics cats are capable of….

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This means that she's doing all of her practicing on Wendy and I… she is in a very precocious stage, where she sees everything as a game, and an opportunity to attack…

It's hard for me to get pictures of her doing it, because all of the pictures are blurred… She's so fast and leaping and jumping… Right now I'm using speech to text, and she is attached to my right arm lightly biting it and gently clawing the fuck out of it… I realize she's just going through her stages but it's becoming a real terror

Like I said I have to be careful that she doesn't jump from a chair or a window sill and land on my face with all of her claws…..

If she does, I can't get mad because she's just being a kitten and she's learning how to be a cat….

But I'll be damned if she's not full throttle

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…and as if On Cue, all the sudden out of nowhere, she comes up and sits on my chest and curls up, purring so loud it's hilarious, being as sweet as could be, as if she was never being a terror at all…

A complete 180

Lol

Cats are cool as shit

and what you call shitfinger, I call art

Noticed that my right index finger has two fingernails….

The fingernail got split right down the middle, and it will never grow back together again… It will always be split down the middle

It's hard to see in this Photograph because of the lighting, but there's a scar that runs all the way down that finger past the knuckle

If I hold it differently and let it catch the Light differently, you can easily see that my finger got split down the middle all the way down past the main knuckle

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WTF ??!!!!

WHAT THE FUK HAPPENED WITH THAT PICTURE? THAT LOOKS WEIRD AS SHIT!

GOD DAMN IT! I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT HAPPENED LET ME TAKE ANOTHER PHOTOGRAPH OF MY FINGER

You still can't see the scar very well that runs down the middle of my finger

I've noticed that if I take a photograph in daylight, it becomes very clear, and you can see there's a scar that runs all the way down past the middle knuckle

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Lol

There's also a scar that runs all the way down on the underside of that finger…..

I SPLIT MY FINGER WIDE OPEN LIKE A BUTTERFLY SHRIMP

Right down the middle, all the way past the middle knuckle… My finger opened up just like a goddamn butterfly shrimp and the bones went flying everywhere.

They tried to collect what bone pieces they could, but the surgeon told me the fragments had been 'pulverized'…..

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They had to fuse the splintered bones together. They used a chunk of a cadaver's bone to do it. My finger will never bend correctly again

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And now (drumroll please) why my finger is fucked up like this

Several years ago, I had done something inadvertently that ended up causing some people a serious amount of grief and trouble… I did not mean to fuck their life up like that, and because I love them very much I was riddled with guilt and grief… I kind of lost my mind, and it's impossible to explain an extremely illogical thought process in logical terms, but for some reason I made a decision that seemed to make a lot of sense at the moment. I decided to take my index finger off so I could never draw again….

I laid my index finger across a T-shaped cast iron bar, and I grabbed a 15 lb sledge Hammer with my left hand…

Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it) I misjudged with the sledgehammer, and instead of removing my finger, I ended up splitting it right down the middle and fracturing all of the bones, pulverizing them and sending them flying across the room.

It sounds crazy, but at the emergency room, they told me they were going to have to amputate my index finger, my middle finger, AND my thumb…

I was happy…

Then, a Dr. named John Wood stepped in and told me, "we're gonna save your hand"

(John is now a friend of mine, and THE BEST doctor I've ever met in my life) John knew that I was an artist. He referred me to Dr. Waldo Floyd, an orthopedic surgeon and a teacher.

Dr. Floyd walked into the room pretending he was playing guitar, and singing "She's Got Legs, She Knows How To Use Them" (ZZ TOP) then informed me that he was 'a Grateful Dead man himself', and informed me of the Good News and the Bad News:

The Good News- I wasn't going to lose my fingers

The Bad News- I still might not ever be able to draw again

(I can)

The Moral of This Story:

I have a LOT of regrets in my life, and the Dunkin Donuts incident is one of the least memorable….

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I can't feel that finger. It's like a dead appendage, and I'm always injuring it without realizing it. The split fingernail is bothersome, always getting hooked on things and yanking one half of it or the other back and away from my finger.

that's why I use speech to text as much as possible.

Nevertheless, I'm continually upbeat
and although people always try to 'psychoanalyze' me as 'being miserable, and taking it out on others', that's not true.

I'm always happy…. Really, I am…
I'm monopolar, hypomanic, content and pleased, even when shot goes badly.

I simply enjoy irritating people

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Dr. Wood….

Young as shit, and by far THE MOST THOROUGH, KNOWLEDGEABLE, PROFESSIONAL & CARING doctor I've ever met… And I've met a lot

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Dr. Waldo Floyd.

He appears to be a 'nerd'

He's NOT. he's an old LSD hippy turned brilliant doctor. He's one of the best orthopedic surgeons you can find

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Dammit!! I just found out Dr. Floyd died last year…

"He was a Freemason.
He was president of the Georgia Orthopaedic Society, and he was president and a founding member of the Georgia Society for Surgery of the Hand. Dr. Floyd was on the Board of Councilors of the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons for six years. He was honored by the Bibb County Medical Society as Doctor of the Year in 2008. He was a Professor of Surgery at Mercer University School of Medicine, instrumental in the school's founding and on the admissions committee.
Dr. Floyd could talk about anything, and he never met a stranger. He was an authority on wiregrass Georgia and Alabama genealogy. In his spare time, he loved carpentry, quail hunting, fishing, working with his hands, and being with his family. He would travel on most rural roads in Georgia and share anecdotes about the individuals named on the bridges. He was a man of God who taught his children to trust in Jesus Christ. He was a gifted physician and surgeon worthy of emulation and a lover of poetry who could recite endless poems. He was loved by family, friends, and patients."

wow……..

Dr Floyd is dead

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>getting this triggered and chimping out this hard because I made more of a laughingstock of you on Zig Forums for your namefagging and attention-whoring

Jim kicks ass at web design
Jim kicks ass at web design
Jim kicks ass at web design
Jim kicks ass at web design
Jim kicks ass at web design
Jim kicks ass at web design

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Lol @ you being SO confused that you think 'doing what I do every day' is being triggered.

You're really not very good at this, are you?

even more importantly:

lol@thinking its possible to be a bigger namefag than my every day namefagging superiority

good luck with that one

(but I understand your desire to attach yourself to my legend)

I apologize for not joining in the festivities last night. I had company show up and they stayed for hours. I fed everyone and eventually got tired, so when they finally left I just crashed. Two of my friends are over 500 pounds each. I told them about the Dunkin' Donut Fries and they seemed even more amped than you, Johnny, if that's even possible!

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What is going on in this thread?

No one knows, but I would like some user that has a Dunkin' Donuts near them to do me a favor, as I live so far out in the country that the nearest Dunkin' Donuts is 2 hours away. I would like someone to post a pic of one of these Donut Stick Fries penetrating the hole of a pink round donut. For reasons.

This is the best I can do on short notice.

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Or this.

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So, absolutely nothing? Gotcha

I got you fam!
I think this is more what you're looking for.

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Dunkin Donuts, eh? Lol the pedophile who haunts the comments section at the goldwater and Zig Forumsthreads gonna get flashbacks…

macon.com/news/local/article140196378.html

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I guess you guys like your glazed sticks rubbing up against each other, but I prefer lesbian donut action. 🍩🍩

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...

Holy shit, real news for a change.

It's all good. I crashed out myself

This thread needs more Neptune.

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I'll be gone for a few hours, but shall return. Keep the dream alive!

Yeah, that sounds about like him.

Nice donut dunkin' stick.
I bet these donut fries are better for dunkin' in coffee than the round ones.

wow you really are fragile lol

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Good one Jorge Nardtaste! You are a real meme master!

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My brothers….

All three were born ABSOLUTE Geniuses… Natural geniuses…

Greg was the most amazingly cool FUNNY AS SHIT dude on Earth. So funny, that everybody who met Greg instantly fell in love with him and considered him 'their best friend'… He just had a way of making you laugh so hard, and feel really good about yourself. I'm not exaggerating when I say Greg would take ANY situation and figure out a different way of looking at it that made you fall over laughing. He'd make you gasp for air from laughing.

Greg got murdered for $8 in a robbery gone wrong.

The other two, while complete geniuses, became at odds with me over differences in opinion regarding my mother's health, and how to handle it. Long story involving power of attorney.

One of them is a strung out cocaine addict who's married to an Assistant District Attorney (she's also a cocaine addict, who brags about 'putting bad people in jail') and they SELL COCAINE….

then…. There's my younger brother…..

Tell me if this sounds familiar.
He's a fucking genius
but he's a video game playing
introvert who sits alone in his
apartment, judgemental, hateful,
pro Trump, anti everything cool
who NEVER EVER EVER GETS LAID

N E V E R

he's mortified of rejection, so he sits locked away in his loneliness playing bullshit video games

And he's a fucking dick
so what if he's a molecular biology and a genius. He's a fucking dick

his only excuse is
he was with Greg when Greg was murdered. He tried to save Greg's life, throwing him into his car and screeching off to a hospital that was only three blocks away
(as the niggers fired their gun into the car)
But Greg was shot in the aorta, and he was dead before they got one block away

He was only 15 when Greg got murdered in front of him

and the situation with my mother, which I will not discuss openly, is why I'd rather eat a bucket of monkey shit than to ever talk with my remaining two brothers ever again

My little brother is 48, and only got laid once in his life (she was a pig, and she forced herself on him)

He looks like Dolf Lundgren, he could get any girl he wants

Hes not gay
He's just a video game playing
Resentful Scared 48 year old child

COOL

STORY

BRO

My whole family are hardcore judgemental Christfags. I will never be good enough for them. They not only show me extreme disrespect in front of everybody, including my children, but they actually talk shit about me to my children and everybody else, both in front of me and behind my back. They have no idea how pissed off it makes me, but I know they are just stupid Christtards, so… I just always leave their presence – been doing it since I was 4 or 5. I've always been alone, and I prefer it. I probably ran away from home over one hundred times, often for weeks. I grew up in South East Asia, and I know how to survive by myself in the jungle. Learned from early experience. Now that I have kids there's no running away, but I never wanted to run away from them. Maybe a break once in awhile would be nice, but I can't very well leave them alone with my parents – they are EXTREMELY abusive, physically, mentally and spiritually.
My brother is a stupider Christfag even than them! We never got along. Ever. He was a little tattletale, and I'm an experiencer. I DO Shit!
Thanks for letting me share.