Your story is pretty common and I went through something similar.
I'm thinking a lot of lefty internet spaces are full of young guys who intuitively know the mainstream liberal and conservative parties are comprised of a bunch of criminals, and they realize the far right is a bunch of psychopaths or just not an option for whatever reason (you're bisexual so that closes that out for you, I'm gay so it's not an option for me), so these young guys accept a nominally socialist platform but don't have much of a lived connection to the left so a lot of what the left does just seems annoying or like an inconvenience (yappity women whining about stuff, restless natives complaining about the copper mine on their sacred mountain, blah blah blah).
But a lot of annoying people have been right about stuff!
Like I live in Texas and while protests are not common, if you go to one here it'll be a like a bunch of Mexican and black women yelling at the top of their lungs about oppression and so on, or yelling about "environmental racism" (hruh? sounds like postmodern gibberish to me! well actually it's because companies dump toxic shit in black neighborhoods because nobody gives a fuck) and if you're some white kid from the suburbs like me that can be very bizarre at first. And there's a temptation to get annoyed by some of this stuff or think of it as like a distraction. Like "I wanna wage the class struggle but these weird pet causes are getting in the way!!!" But that is an error I think. The world is really complicated.
I'd liken it to Homer Simpson trying to stop a nuclear meltdown and he pulls out a giant instruction manual and he goes "who would have thought a nuclear reactor would be so… complicated!!!???" Except the nuclear reactor is the world and history and the instruction manual reads "Dialectical Materialism": youtube.com/watch?v=v5MOatu5-DE
Anyways, here's the reading list I use: scribd.com/document/143368029/Communism-Reading-List
If I could leave you with a nugget, it's to say that classical Marxism says that there is a determining objective / structural position (economic class) at the root of society that corresponds with a subjective position (proletarian / worker) and the working class is exploited. So the proletariat's job is to unite and overthrow capitalism + abolish class society and this is gonna happen like a runaway train with no brakes. Now I think this is basically true in a broad sense but it got more complicated when this did not happen in a straightforward way. Like classical Marxism would've predicted a proletarian revolution to occur in the most advanced capitalist countries, which obviously did not happen, and also failed to account for the rise of autonomous social movements. So a lot of contemporary debates on the left have emerged in the context of this "re-theorizing" and to what if any extent it diverges from core principles.
Just jumping in here to ramble on without anyone asking me. I think a lot of white nationalist types have this basic bitch ideology that black people (in particular) are just actively hostile to white people, and liberal multiculturalism comes across as like a fraud to them or like turning white people into lambs for the slaughter.
I don't think this is actually true, but liberal multiculturalism tends to not do itself many favors because it tends to be wrapped up in this gooey, warm idealistic vision that we just need to "love" each other or all get along. I think that asks too much of people. Like I live in heavily black city and I'll pop behind a bus stop to smoke a cigarette and see some black guys hanging out around the same spot give me a dirty look but that's only a problem if I cared about them "accepting" me or whatever. It's just not necessary for people to like each other like that. Like the most you can ask from people is a mutual and minimum standard of mutual respect, and a dirty look ranks pretty low in the disrespect department. It's not like anyone is getting up in anyone's business.
It's just not a big deal, is what I'm saying. I guess the opposite (also bad) version of how white people handle this is to overcompensate and try to "be down" with black people or whatever, because they want to be accepted and liked. But like I said it's just not necessary.
