Two Goldwater Reporters Admit Being Gay, Go On a Hot Date Tomorrow Night!

100% TRUE Neptune News™

Tomorrow night, James and Philip are going out on a date to see the crappy VENOM movie.

Neither James or Philip have girlfriend's, because they're not sexually attracted to females. James (who openly brags about his sexual attraction to Tom Hardy, the actor in Venom) asked Philip out on a date to see the film last month, and tomorrow night, the shitty movie is being released in Manila, The Philippines.

James Burdock and Philip Fairbanks are the only two real staff members at the Goldwater. In Manila, it's really just them who handle the creation of their half-assed, misspelled, off-base bullshit slanted Alt-Right imitation 'news' for fatass gynecomastia sufferer Jim Watkins, while Diana sits around on her ass, getting underfoot, and surfing Facebook on the Mac Laptop that Jim loans her in exchange for handjobs.

James, who goes by several ridiculous names, including 'Major Burdock' and 'Kyle James', is a diminutive little sissy with no chin, who resembles Elmer Fudd.

Philip is a tree-hugging, left wing, homeopathic herb extract-toutung sissy, but James finds him sexually attractive because of his stupid out-of-date long hair. Philip has admitted feeling a bit jealous that James gushes in public about how 'hot' he thinks Tom Hardy is.

Philip and James have been planning this hot date for a while now, and they are going to snuggle next to each other and hold hands in the darkened theatre.

thegoldwater.com/news/32833-Venom-Trailer-2-Takes-Fans-On-A-Hell-Of-A-Ride
There has been one previous thread about this article.

Attached: homosexuals.jpg (2289x1710, 323.03K)

I've always wondered why Jim let's Diana borrow his Mac laptop, while she can barely construct a coherent sentence, and contributes nothing at The Goldwater.

Meanwhile, Phillip and James do all the work, but Jim lets them use two worthless old ThinkPads.

ftfy

yes, and what's even stranger is how since Jim is an admitted bisexual, he openly confessed to hiring James and Philip because of their sexual preferences, but still he let Diana borrow the good laptop while Philip and James have to do all of the work on those two crappy ThinkPads.

I read Kyle James' article about the Venom movie, and it's easy to understand why Philip would be a little bit Jealous. James basically admitted that he wants to suck Tom Hardy's dick.

I think it's sweet that two colleagues at The Goldwater had the courage to finally come out of the closet and admit that they enjoy drinking each other's sperm. I hope their date goes well, and I'd like to remind Philip that's not hot butter on the popcorn.

Sounds about right

in Major Burdock's article about the movie Venom, I counted 47 references to how sexy James thinks Tom Hardy is.

it's completely transparent how Jim tries to hide his bisexuality and degeneracy behind a false mask of 'patriotism', and how Philip & James attempt to hide their flamboyant homosexuality behind a facade of Republican judgementalism.

James Burdock is obviously a queen who hides behind a predictable bullshit fabricated 'macho' military cheesy masculinity, wearing ridiculous children's Halloween camouflage facepaint.

Finally.
Some REAL News around here!
No need to camouflage it anymore.

Attached: 8706713ff2788c6c66dff55ae87637f3796203eead493cace74506c930137ced.jpg (1920x1080, 352.75K)

lol

The real question is..
When will Diana Printz come out as a jizm guzzler?

Attached: Diana's Bright Idea.gif (242x180, 67.16K)

Ban incoming..

Nah. The entire post will be deleted in
3-2-1…

I meant thread.
Well, both, really..

I'm curious which one takes the role of the male, and which one takes the role of the female.

Philip seems more effeminate, because his biceps are smaller then my five year old daughter's wrists, and he has the long hair.

James is obviously fixated on his fabricated bullshit military facade, which at first glance, would make it seem like he's the Macho Man, the one who plays the role of 'the male' in the couple…

but when you take a closer look, you'll see that the contrived military facade is his way of 'going in drag', and in all actuality, he has no chin or prominent masculine facial features, so he spends his life hiding behind sunglasses, military hats, and that ridiculous children's Halloween camouflage face paint. James is much, much more effeminate.

Philip has the body of an anorexic female runway model, and the embarrassingly out of date long hairstyle, but he has more body hair and facial whiskers, and a more prominent masculine nose and chin.

THAT'S why I would say Philip is the top and major Burdock is the bottom.

In the meantime..

Attached: Git.Thee.Behind.Me.Jim.jpg (1000x764, 182.9K)

Stop h8ing on long hair!

Attached: 28c2f50f3d1c058bad9230cd383f968bf19802d0a66f4e0e8fb107fd2843fbec.jpg (960x1200, 175.16K)

just because i said it's out of date, I never said I 'hated it'

Attached: IMG_20181003_110504.jpg (960x1200, 181.49K)

BTW, I was actually called for jury duty for the beaver fugger. No lie. I was dismissed, probably for being a worse derelict even than him, but seriously..
I could have had a say in beaver-fugger's future! If only I could recommend he be fucked repeatedly by beavers for the rest of his meth-addled life..

I think it's sweet

Attached: videoblocks-loving-couple-kissing-in-back-seats-in-cinema-in-slow-motion-young-couple-alone-at-empty-theater-romantic-love-couple-kissing-in-movie-theatre-romantic-cinema-date_roizacgl7_thumbnail-small08.jpg (320x180, 7.47K)

that's actually not surprising, either that you got called, or dismissed

that's a perfect example of the ironic synchronicity behind how life really works

It will come back in vogue.
In the meantime, I'll keep growing mine out, and you'll keep doing 'vogue'..
and I'll keep looking for old images depicting you doing 'vogue',; because, atm, I can't locate them..

Extra boner points for images depicting either James or Philip 'doing vogue'..

young love will ALWAYS be en Vogue

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-11.17.10.png (2204x1454, 2.02M)

notta problem

but I need to change the cat's litter boxes and feed them first

and YES…. of course….

the internet has ANY and EVERY thing in history stored somewhere….

everything except VOGUING, because it was SO bad, that all record of it has been erased

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-11.35.03.jpg (1152x1720, 309.32K)

Well at least we have confirmation now, that the Goldwater is full of fags

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-11.36.22.png (1915x1080, 853.29K)

Been doing my best to not only find a pic of Johnny Neptune doing Vogue, but MUST find my favorite rendition of Ida Maria doing 'Stella'..
It will tear your heart out.
In the meantime..

fucking boomer thread

I'm curious if Major BirdDick will be able to maintain every time Tom Hardy appears on the screen….

if he gushes too much about how 'sexy' Tom Hardy is, it could ruin the date, and make for an uncomfortable evening afterwards.

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-11.52.13.jpg (1498x1080, 274.39K)

while I'm busy creating an image of FANGTASTICO™ breakdancing, I'll let you enjoy the funky Republican Conservative Folk Music of Philip Fairbanks

I heard he wrote a version of this song called 'Im Your DooDoo Doll', and dedicated it to Major BirdDick's penis.

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-12.07.33.png (1296x1080, 1.09M)

I think Jim should hire an outside Sensitivity Training Consultation Firm to step in, and teach James that his words can be very painful to Philip, and making such a big deal over how 'hot he thinks Tom Hardy is' can leave Philip feeling insecure about his place in James' life.

Attached: IMG_20181003_121124.jpg (1079x1615, 256.58K)

Jim and Diana could teach James how to romance Philip correctly, by trading out a laptop, a bed, and an imaginary job for handjobs and cleaning the toilets.

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-12.28.51.jpg (1024x853, 102.24K)

but all women want to feel special, like they're number one…. so of course Philip's tired of hearing about Tom Hardy.

Attached: IMG_20181003_121111.jpg (1079x1532, 242.82K)

at first, I thought this was a pic of Major BirdDick in middle school, but then I realized he never got an 'everybody hates my guts' award until he got hired at the Goldwater

Attached: PicsArt_10-03-12.35.29.jpg (2202x1577, 486.06K)

boring

How did these 2 end up in the Philippines?

Are they american ex-pats?

How did Jimbo end up there?

Cheaper to live off a fixed income there(US pension?)

Sex tourism?

Was Diana a victim of american sex abuse when she was a child?

Andy really has invested a lot of time in trolling these 2.
I'm detecting some repressed homosexual hostility

A: Courtney DeAnne Tubbs-Moseley (the fat fucking idiot who calls herself 'RedPill', and stands in as an extra reporter from Mobile Alabama, phone number 251-303-3766) told me recently that Jim was familiar with The Philippines and the prostitution from his stint in the military, and years later, when Jim was charged with tax evasion, he quickly fled back to The Philippines.

Courtney and Philip were online friends back in the Myspace days, before Facebook took over.

James went to The Philippines to avoid a sex crimes investigation in which they still haven't filed charges against him, and Philip was a ne'er do well from McMinnville, Tennessee who tried operating a crappy small business called NEW DAWN from his tiny house, where he tried selling 'natural remedies', homeopathic nonsense herbs and barks. New Dawn only sold ONE order (absolutely 100% true, research it) then he hitchhiked to California, where he stayed in a Hostel for almost two months, before he somehow got hooked up with James and moved to the Philippines on Jim's dollar.

too bad you're unable to repress your flamboyant homosexuality

Attached: 02fa5a1f579b22d8c23ba08499b5957d3546cde738ab116d8bd17ebd521d1684.jpg (1728x1080, 280.31K)

Diana never went to America. She was working at a weird 'nightclub' where the girls all double as prostitute, (just like all Filipino women do) and Courtney told me that Jim was a customer at that nightclub and that's where he met Diana and Jash.

Jash is the fat faced, hideous Filipino prostitute.

Courtney DeAnne Tubbs-Moseley also reports her bullshit fabricated version of the 'news' under the pseudonym Savannah Smith

the way the faggots at The Goldwater have it set up, the Philippines staff work one shift, they have a British homosexual who uses the name 'Steve Dellar' to handle the next shift (and weekends) from the UK, and they have fat faced Courtney DeAnne Tubbs-Moseley handle the third shift from Alabama.

Attached: BOOF ME!.jpg (789x460, 80.93K)

Still waiting for the image of me break-dancing..

Got my special message from Trump.
Weirdly, all was written in both English and Chinese.
Sorry. No screenshot..

My VPN is US too..

Also, (((they))) contacted me via my Google Voice number.. Again..

Attached: Capture _2018-10-03-11-25-42.png (1396x617, 65.18K)

Japanese? Someone?

Came here for the gayness..
Stayed for the boofing.

lol little johnny is still being a jealous virgin with rage i see. don't worry little guy one day you'll find a man who likes ugly homeless retarded midgets.

That's a lot of back story

I've been posting here I think a lot longer than you(yrs before the goldwater blog) and i never really cared about the background.

I have never watched a goldwater youtube vid and have visited the blog under 10 times.

I got pissed off when Jimbo created Zig Forums and almost destroyed Zig Forums and my shot posting

I tried posting to Zig Forums in the beginning, but the the constant banning and removal of the slightest anti-trump posts really pissed me off(this was pre-election).

I spent a couple of months destroying Zig Forums's chances of getting established but grew bored after a couple of months


I left for a couple yrs, came back in early 2018 and saw that Zig Forums was under 100 users and Zig Forums was completely full of thread after thread of copy/paste shit

They didn't even give anons a chance to reply before new stuff was posted.
There was no support of interesting threads by Zig Forums people replying with interesting comments to their own threads

Just post the next story

It was easy for me to bump Zig Forums back up.

but it's been 8 months on and off and I'm bored,and Zig Forums is doing ok on it's own, so I may leave for a while.

(sac)

I also have become a news junkie
6 yrs ago I didn't give a shit about international affairs, only about my own back yard.
Trump has been great entertainment(I watch the Colbert monologue on youtube every morning) ut even this is getting boring

back…………..

sorry, I was on the phone with my son

and now I'm getting ready to go to class