A Florida gas station owner has placed a sign in his store asking customers not to warm urine in the microwave.
Parul Patel says he’s become “sick and tired” of people walking into his BP gas station and On the Fly convenience store in Jacksonville to warm their containers of urine. The store is within walking distance of two labs that offer drug testing services and collect urine samples.
Patel tells First Coast News the people who used his microwave to warm urine “walk in off the street, microwave their urine containers then leave.”
He says a woman became aggressive a few months ago when he asked her not to warm urine. She asked to see a sign that says it’s not for that purpose. So he made one.
I'm assuming it destroys any trace of drug use that was in the person's system
Jaxon Walker
Actually, I’d imagine it’s because of you but clean urine from someone or a store (there are stores that allow it) you want to microwave it so it doesn’t seem colder than it actually would be when it leaves the body.
Connor Hernandez
Why would a drug testing facility allow you to bring in your urine from outside instead of insisting you produce the sample on-site? I mean if you can bring the urine in from the outside there is no guarantee that it's even your urine.
Jayden Mitchell
This 98 degrees
I bet these druggies over nuke it and hepatitis piss splattered oven
Ian Russell
Both make no sense…urine doesn't destroy traces of drugs, especially not from the addict themselves and heating up clean urine, would mean they would have to run out of the store and to whatever testing place they have to be. Kinda unrealistic.
Logan Turner
Nevermind, here comes the even more disturbing explanation…
Aiden Long
???????
Connor Sullivan
If you go into a head shop you can buy fake urine it has a temperature gauge on the side and tells you to microwave it for a few seconds it comes with the heat boring pack that you tape to it that will keep it at body temperature and you just hide it on you somewhere. Then you pull it out and poured in the piss cup and it will show that you have clean urine they don't test to see if it's urine a test to see if it has drugs in it. I've done it before it worked
Do labs reject samples that aren't body temperature? Also why don't you use a lighter and a grocery bag?
Anthony Ortiz
They're supposed to. Not all labs do, but the ones for getting a job somewhere all require your piss to be piss temperature.
Oliver Evans
...
Liam Gomez
There's basically three tests they run on urine depending on the facility and how stringent they are. 1) Does it contain drugs? 2) Does it have the characteristics of urine? (temperature, color, etc.) 3) Is it actually urine? (certain chemicals are checked for like creatine breakdown substances) Most places only do the first two checks and will deny your urine sample if it's cold, pale, etc. The third check is more expensive so only certain businesses utilize it.
Gavin Nelson
You hide it. Not every drug testing facility is strict about searching your body for urine samples or urine-creating substances.
Aiden Hall
It ain't about passing a test, user…it's much worse.
Aaron Ramirez
Florida's where we dump our old and crazy. We send our retarded to the nearest metro area.
Bentley Lewis
For real. Every person born in Florida gets the fuck out. They go to college out of state and never come back.
Tyler Walker
I can’t imagine it often works, but someone brings in stone cold urine and I bet that’s an automatic failure
they are testing for metabolites, which is completely different than drugs…
Parker Lee
Yes, yes, JN. I'm will aware. Drug metabolites are the result of drugs you double nigger. The only exception are some opiates, which I'm sure you're more than familiar with.
Elijah James
Do people actually give a shit about this? Gas is fucking gas. It's one fucking compound unless we're discussing leaded vs lead-free gas.
Owen Davis
There's a hallucinogenic dissociative found in amnita muscara that actually doesn't metabolize, you could drink your urine technically.
I'm not sure why or if it only partially metabolizes.
Tyler Rodriguez
Nigger, the tanks it's stored in, transported in, and the pumps all matter.
Would you rather use some niggery backwoods as 100 miles into the country gas station with 30 year old pumps or some Shell gas station in the middle of town?
Charles Wright
It doesn't metabolize. It gets used by your body and then passes in its "raw' form. Ancient societies would sometimes capture a deer or use a cow as a sacrifice, feed it a lethal amount of Christmas mushrooms, and then drink its urine when it passes out and pisses itself. Sometimes the shaman would do so and then they'd make him puke up the actual mushrooms so he wouldn't die.
Parker Morris
I'm furious !!!!
earlier today, I microwaved some of my urine down at the On The Fly BP Station
and when I left the store, I completely forgot my urine was still in the microwave
I called down there, and the asshole Patel behind the counter told me he look in the microwave and couldn't find my urine !!!…….
either he's keeping it for himself or somebody else stole it
DAMMIT !!!
Owen Taylor
I'm furious !!!!
earlier today, I microwaved some of my urine down at the On The Fly BP Station
and when I left the store, I completely forgot my urine was still in the microwave
I called down there, and the asshole Patel behind the counter told me he look in the microwave and couldn't find my urine !!!…….
Andrew Hill
keep licking those boots, fake urine is to the 4th amendment that any firearm is to the second
William Evans
the opiate crisis is THIS BAD in America there are so many pill junkies around the mills in florida burrito microwaves are becoming an infection vector for hepatits.
This is why you don't become part of the "kratom community" or anything else that flirts with fucking opiates. king heroin has always been the number one killer drug.
Lincoln Roberts
sorry about that
I'm so fucking pissed about my urine that I accidentally posted twice !!!
Joshua Richardson
...
Aiden Mitchell
in all honesty, I actually AM pissed off right now !!!
FOR SOME REASON, MY FIRST CALL DIDN'T GET RECORDED!!!
I actually had the guy go look in the microwave to try to find a jar of piss
he came back and told me he couldn't find it, so I described it to him, and asked him if he would look again…
he did… then I started to accuse him of stealing my container of urine
johnny, nice prank call duder you got a laugh out of me
Jaxson Hill
I wish you could've heard the first call. it was great, but my recorder wasn't set right.
Robert Phillips
...
Asher Hill
Those fucks need to buy their own microwave ovens
Mason Baker
That doesn't work. They should just drink bleach.
Chase Rodriguez
Why would anyone do that? Okay, that explains it.
Jack Green
bullshit
Luis Ross
I find it absolutely amazing how none of you seem to realize the reason these people are microwaving their urine
Isaac Campbell
Well i don't think anyone sane or introvert have microwaved their urine or seen someone do it continuously
Angel Wood
neither have I, but you don't have to see somebody do this to understand WHY they're doing it.
they're not trying to neutralize or remove traces of drugs from their urine.
they're taking somebody else's urine, somebody who's not using drugs, in trying to get it warm before they walk the two blocks to the urinalysis companies nearby.
Jaxson Diaz
I don't know man, i have taken tests that use urine and i'm dead certain they didn't allow outside piss as i was ordered to take a leak at the bath Can be bypassed like said tho
Eli Nguyen
some testing facilities are more lax than others.
sometimes, they're so unprofessional, that they just let the subjects go into a restroom by themselves.
the WHIZZINATOR has two versions:
one with just a tube you tape under your penis
and one with a fake penis
Brayden Young
the two types of urinalysis tests are:
the simple litmus paper test, generally a 7 or 12 panel test, on the spot, and it'll generally have a thermo strip on the cup, so they can see if your piss is in the proper temperature range
then there's the gas chromatography-mass spectrometry.
white trash, uneducated dope-heads, with no understanding of clinical technicalities or protocol
and now that this story is public, the urinalysis facilities down the street have become aware of it
Mason Brown
these are the same type of idiots who believe stupid street myths, like if you ask an undercover cop if he's a police officer, he has to admit it or any other number of idiotic street notions
Jonathan Roberts
I nuked a dog turd for my art project It dried out and didn't smell
Camden Carter
The Original Whizzinator is a product advertised as a "wet sex simulator" intended to simulate male urination as a safer alternative to using real urine for sexual fetish activity; but most consumers purchase the device to fraudulently defeat drug tests. The Whizzinator comes as a kit complete with dried urine and syringe, heater packs (to keep the urine at body temperature), a false penis (available in several skin tones including white, tan, Latino, brown, and black) and instruction manual. The company also offered a female version of the Whizzinator, called "Number One." There is no information on exactly how this product differs from the "disposable unisex" product also on the market. It was manufactured by Puck Technology of Signal Hill, California; a suburb of Los Angeles.
The device received media coverage in May 2005 in the United States after Onterrio Smith, a former Minnesota Vikings running back, was caught with one at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport, which resulted in his suspension. Actor Tom Sizemore has also brought the Whizzinator into the public eye after having been caught with one attempting to evade drug tests.
oddly enough, years and years ago I took a shit into a pisscup and then I handed it to the woman who had told me to 'empty my pockets and go into the bathroom' by myself
100% true… I really did
Carson Gray
Federal fraud case
On October 14, 2008, the United States Attorney for the Western District of Pennsylvania won a 19-count indictment against Puck Technology, maker of the Whizzinator, and its owners for fraud and selling drug paraphernalia. Prosecutors allege that by manufacturing and selling the Whizzinator, Puck Technology, company president Gerald Wills and vice president Robert Catalano conspired to defraud the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, which administers federal workplace drug testing programs. The government sought forfeiture of all of the company's assets, including its Internet domain names.[4]
On November 24, Puck Technology, Wills and Catalano pleaded guilty in a Pittsburgh federal court to one count of conspiracy to defraud the government and one count of conspiracy to sell drug paraphernalia. Wills and Catlano were scheduled to be sentenced in February 2009. They faced up to eight years in prison and an $800,000 fine.[5][6][7]
In April 2010, Willis was sentenced to six months of prison and Catalano was sentenced to three years of probation.[8]
shit WTF!
Lincoln Williams
I have the perfect way to handle a urinalysis. stop doing drugs.
I'm two years clean, and never think about getting high at all
Liam Foster
hence, it being advertised as a "wet sex simulator" intended to simulate male urination as a safer alternative to using real urine for sexual fetish activity
much like research chemicals like bath salts being sold as INCENSE
Matthew Wright
What is Synthetic Urine?
Synthetic urine is the same exact chemical make up of real urine. There is absolutely no difference between a cup of real urine and synthetic urine. In fact, if you were to ask a urine expert – which you could say that would be us – which urine is real and which urine is fake…we would have no idea as long as it is the Alternative Lifestyle Systems brand of synthetic urine (called the Golden Shower).
William Sullivan
I have a jo with a fed piss lab
I stand there all day and squeeze cocks with a latex gloved hand to see if it's real.
I may be gay
Nolan Wood
hahahahahaha
Leo Richardson
urine is UREA, the toxins that are filtered out of our blood by our kidneys, and oddly enough the pH of urea is good for the eyes
in ancient times, when a tribe member contracted conjunctivitis, the other members of the tribe would actually urinate into his eyes….
and it worked perfectly
that's why they make a roughly equal synthesis that we use in our eyes to this day…
if you take the 'M' out of 'Murine™, what do you have?
Brandon Allen
whether it's heterogeneous carbohydrates or creatine, there's always some 'expert' who thinks he knows all about the science of urinalysis….
these are generally the same people who think they are chemists, and they can make methamphetamine from cold pills and camping fuel in the bathtub of their trailer
So that when they sneak it into the lab it doesn't seem old.
Blake Reed
I often have crystal clear piss. Are you telling me that I can fail a drug test based on my urine being TOO clean, or from being TOO well hydrated or having TOO good of a diet? I guess I'll go swallow a bottle of ibuprofen to destroy my liver and kidneys then. What a crock.
