Can we talk about women (female posters please chime in)?
I dont want to bash women or go into sexist tirades. Keep them at the door.
I want to understand the nature of women from the perspective of God. I have started seeing a woman who had past sexual encounters (not many but a few) within the realms of a relationship; she is otherwise a great and dedicated girl. At first I didnt care but it has slowly been eating away at me. When I spoke to her about my discomfort she expressed shame and regret but didnt really understand why it was a big deal - i concluded her shame and regret came from her trying to appease my value for purity; she herself didnt really get it. I feel like I cant look at her as if she is pure anymore because she allowed more than the man she wants to marry to share her body. On the flipside, I have preserved myself up until this point because I instinctively value purity so much.
But what hurts me most is that I am not sure if women innately value purity and chastity. Why do men put a high value on this but women do not seem to? There is a mismatch in nature. God's design should be balanced and I feel unsettled by this.
Women tend to be in conflict: they inherently think they should be chaste but simultaneously they want to do lewd and decadent acts. I cant understand this. Why dont women want to inherently protect their body for the right man? Why do they give it so easily even early on in "relationships"
I understand we look to God to overcome our sins and temptations but sin is a departure from God's design for us. Therefore, a desire for purity should already be baked into the fiber of our being. I feel like this desire exists more strongly for men than in women and I cant understand why for the life of me.
I am feeling depressed and despondent over these observations. Life and nature dont make any sense. Its less about this girl im seeing and more about the implications of what it means in nature and God's design.
Are women incapable of appreciating purity? I feel like they require reinforced learning to value it via the bible, a church community and godly parents; whereas men have an innate love of purity, beauty and chastity. This makes me then question whether a womans striving for purity is real in her heart or just a means of social acceptance.
I dont want to feel this way. In many ways I want to be convinced Im looking at it wrong. Share personal experiences if you can and references from the bible.
The reason I have heard of this being so from a Catholic mentor who is old, wise, and I trust, is this: men "get more" (think of it in terms of merit, power, gains, etc) from their chastity than women. It is more difficult and more valued for them (usually). Women are supposed to basically use this in marriage for their own gains, and then return it back to the man for him to become better (trust relationship fundamentally), in addition to bringing children into the world, etc. With the modern problems we have, all of this is brokenand so now we have this situation that you've noticed.
Take his words for what you will
I think I follow.
I mean that men value purity in their women. Women want strong men who display leadership and in turn men strive to be that person.
But men value a pure and chaste woman. Why dont women strive to be that person?
I do understand and agree that a man being chaste is more valuable because of the relative difficulty to do so. That also begs the question: if its easier for women, why dont they do it or want to do it?
Use what? I dont comprehend this part.
Thanks user. God bless you
Pretty sure there are no women in chans. >inb4 "femanon here :)" Polite sage for off topic
The same way it happened with almost all things in modern times, women are used as yet another tool of subversion against core christian morals and values. There's no secret or mysterious reason when it comes to this matter, women are easily persuaded and need to hold onto a figure of leadership because that's in their nature, if a woman is properly raised in a christian household, sheltered from outside sources of bad influences and degeneracy, in the presence of a strong father figure to guide her life until marriage (where she'll be under the headship of her christian husband after taking the vows) there's no way she could be led astray.
It all comes down to the destruction and complete disregard of morality that society has embraced. Purity and chastity is frowned upon, even ridiculed, in favor of promiscuity, perceiving the latter as a form of independence and freedom when in reality, it's nothing but a grievous sin that defiles the spirit and only offers momentary pleasure of the flesh. For women this is even more of a terrible consequence, because it marks them for life, failing in preserving what is their holy duty as the recipient of the seed: preserving her purity for the right man, securing and tending to her temple (body) where she'll bear the fruit of life.
No righteous man would want for their seed to bear fruit in the body of a woman that has been already given herself to other men.
You're taking it for granted, user. Purity is only valued to the extent that one understands its value. There is nothing biologically intrinsic to the valuing of an abstract such as purity. Women are simply much more suggestible than men. Women submit and men enforce, so when our sick society says this kind of stuff is okay all the women submit and even a good amount of the men do. But the same is true with a healthy society where purity is valued, the women submit and a good amount of the men don't. That's how the retarded concept of "a key that opens many locks is a great key" came about, because women were chaste and men were not. It was a degenerating period where there was a challenge to taking womens' virginity. Now it's so easy the challenge is in chastity. It's all a pendulum.
From my experience, "worldly" men (90% of men) do not value chastity at all. From chads using tinder as a sex catalog, white knights and beta orbiters that gravitate towards instathots to all the degenerate stuff you find in imageboards, it seems that most men don't really make an effort to keep chaste.
I feel deep sickness in my stomach at the thought of breeding with an impure woman. It feels biological and not a learned behavior.
Why dont women feel a deep sickness by having more than 1 sexual partner?
Men respect chaste women for a reason. Even men who whore around. It is instinctive and biological.
Women dont seem to understand this.
To clarify, men want to marry pure and chaste women and winnie the pooh/drump whores almost out of disrespect for them. This is a biological and instinctive feeling.
*have sex and dump whores
Idk what happened there
Consider the Greeks valued virgins too before Christianity. Aristotle came up with the concept of telegony
I've seen quite a few men pride themselves on corrupting (pumping and dumping) virgin women, so I must disagree with you.
Lurk moar, lel.
No we agree. Those same men will not want to marry a defiled woman. It is the contradiction of man.
Yes, you're spot-on with this post. Men with a high partner count can often be seen complaining about how all women are sluts. Yet, they think nothing of the times they've taken the virginity of various women, indirectly starting them down a path of sexual depravity.
Because their brains aren't wired in the same way as men. Their nature is to follow and obey, if feminism, cultural marxism and/or any other degenerate movement emerges and settle itself as the dominant one, it becomes the norm for women to follow it's ways and internalize them.
Is it possible that after their first failed bond with a partner they are mentally ruined? I know girls give their bodies up in hopes of pleasing and keeping a man and it is often abused
I dont think this is entirely true. This is a component that affects both men and women (porn makes men think pumping and dumping sluts is the goal of life until they do it and realize it isnt). Cultural movements can cloud our real desires set by God with fake ones set by (((media))) and lead us down a path of misery.
Im talking about the innate real desires of women set by God
i think you might be generalizing a bit, i've seen women feel the same disgust as you.
That's why sex needs to be inside marriage. Muh "I love my boyfriend and i need to sexually satisfy him" is irresponsible and degenerate
You forget that women are sexual beings as well user. Chastity is not an innate behavior, it's a higher executive function that we've placed value on because of how it moderates and tempers lust. When we live in a society that places lust on a higher premium than chastity, plenty of people, men and women, innocent and guilty, are caught in the sociological crossfire.
What's more, all women have to straddle a line between their sexual desires and their 'don't look like a whore' desires, because a whore is seen as a lower class citizen in the social world of women. It's where the adage 'virgin in the streets, whore in the sheets' came about, hence a lot of 'good girls' fall into emotional traps (the primary sexual exciter in women) that lead them to sin, often times regretting it.
But a history is a history, and nonetheless should be measured against your principles. The man that you are now is not the man you were even a year ago, and it will not be the man you will be in 5 years; it is the same for her. Stick to your principles, but mind your execution; the last thing you want to do is stick to your guns on finding such a perfect woman that you finally find one, only to discover she's looking for the perfect man, and it isn't you.
All partners have flaws that they accept about each other, its why they love each other despite the bad parts, just as God loves us despite the bad parts.
We already have a thread about the "nature of women", and its the cringiest collection of incel biterness ive ever seen.
Btw Yup. Exactly what i expected.
I randomly came here from the homepage and couldn't even finish reading. Religion can't answer your question because god didn't create us. If god exists then he created us indirectly, through evolution.
What does evolution have to do with women's nature? everything. Men, actually not just men, males in general are used to conquering other territories and raping the females. The females who couldn't accept rape DIED WITH THEIR GENES. Females who accepted and maybe even enjoyed rape had the most chance of survival with their new husbands. Their genes lived on. What I'm saying is, women are hardcoded to be sluts. They are genetically drawn to the better male because in the past that meant SURVIVAL. Loyalty literally got them killed. Women have to be indoctrinated into loyalty through culture/religion. If not, their nature simply shows.
My opinion? You should think hardly if you truly want a female partner that has fornicated. You don't want to marry, and spend the rest of your life with a girl and have "she slept with other guys" in the back if your head every night, right? Also, we must remember that women use sex to get what they want a lot of the times. Are you an up and coming actress trying to land a movie role, with little to no money to your name? Sex is what they use to get what they want, remember this. Good luck, and make sure to pray about it as well. I hope God will answer you soon.