Microsoft Windows 7 patch warns of coming patchocalypse

what do you mean? It does everything I want it to do and it runs on every device I need it to.

Yet they released DX12 and Chromium Edge for Windows 7

What?

Linux, as a kernal and OS are developed well, but not enough people port their programs to it. The gaming industry is an example.

AWS rules the cloud.
AWS is almost solid linux.

What else is it? I would imagine an Amazon-made specialized OS?

What else is it?
Linux and a ton of other open source projects plus custom stuff. A lot of EC2 instances use "Amazon Linux". You can host your own whatever on EC2 hosting, so you can put your own windows there if you want.
There is a big stink going on because AWS sells their Elasticsearch feature by the hour but it's a fork of the Elasticsearch opensource project, and now AWS released their fork and it's leapfrogged the original project.

Yeah. No.
Not so much patchocalypse.
More like patchinconvenience.
It's possible for Win7 images to run as they presently are far past the time that MS supports them.
I don't do regular patches, and sometimes I have to go get Net Framework this or C++ framework that to install something. Eventually those patches may dry up, but will take a while.
Workarounds for things like Daylight Savings time and etc were created for XP.
Updates for certificate trusted authorities etc could happen through other mechanisms.
Security wise, I prefer to be without the latest Win7 patches from MS, with good reason to believe that they don't operate in good faith with regard to privacy invasion. I'm just hoping that SP1 didn't have a lot of telemetry.
If you're really paranoid you could run a third party firewall while you are at the coffee shops.

If you have a good PC then you can setup a Windows VM guest with hardware (GPU) passthrough. It's way better than WINE in terms of compatibility. You'll still be running Windows but it'll have no access to the host OS.
As long as you only use it for gayman shit then it shouldn't matter.

Also, you're delusional if you think that Windows 7 isn't spyware, when Microsoft has already back ported all if its telemetry shit since years ago.

newb