Thinking about becoming an atheist or gnostic again

St. Augustine had the exact same problem vis a vis the concubines of the Hebrew Fathers and anthropomorphize of God in the OT, and it's the reason he was a manichean for so many years. The Bible is ludicrously difficult text to unpack; so my advice to you is to read up more on the Church Fathers and strive for a deeper understanding of the Faith.
The Church has always held that if one is not introduced to the divine law, they will still be saved if they live according to the natural law. In other words, if they follow the good as informed by their conscience and avoid evil, they can still be saved. The problem is that even among those who have the divine law, very few choose to actually follow it, renounce the world, and live for God, despite how light his yoke is. People tend to have a very distorted view of, say, the middle ages, wherein they think that everyone was perfectly pious and basically born and bred for heaven, when in reality they were, on the whole, just as dismissive of the truth then as they are now. Many are called, but few are chosen. Everyone gets the graces necessary for salvation, but few, even those with the sacraments, choose it.

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crap did I not clarify I was laughing at you and not OP, mb

The people are both helpful and charitable if you're a Christian. What they aren't is your feel-good counselor to make you feel better about your failings.
Rather, they want to purge them out of you and save you. That takes you acknowledging harsh realities.
You're luke-warm man. You have no conviction. You're on a path to eternal hell. It doesn't matter what's instinctive to you- if you devoted your time and energy to reasoning the truth you'd realize Christianity -is- the truth
Anyway, get saved, or enjoy your nihilism.

What it means to me moreso is he seeks a personal relationship which in my mind is impossible since I'm such a piece of shit I'd never want to ever see him face-to-face. If he's real I dread the day I meet him, thats my point.

Christians could believe in reincarnation, veggie, and pacifism. I somehow agree with reincarnation but this isnt really about that. Its about finding the truth and that is Jesus Christ.

Not yet apparently. You are still looking clarity in your quest for Christ.

Not really, the law is written upon all our hearts. For those who seek righteousness, at the hour of their death they will be given a chance to witness, repent, and believe. Our Lord accounts for all.

Hearing the word of God means more chance of not going to the eternal BBQ-pit. There were people whom did not received the gospel yet given the chance because they seek righteousness by the laws written in their hearts. But those who did not follow in law in their hearts nor have heard of it, they NEEDED the gospels, hence evangelism. Again, our Lord accounts for all.

Yeah, I know that I did not back those up with theology, philosophy, etc. It is not that those are worthless or anything; they are means to understand the nature of our Lord but not absolute nor complete. The only proper method is through faith. I have faith our Lord is righteousness and goodness, whose mercy is infinite and He accounts for all of His children.

Gnosticism treats spiritual things as science and craft, one would as well measure sound with a ruler. That is why it is treated as non-sense, a dangerous non-sense which promotes hubris and pride in which one would thought to outwit the Lord.

You don’t have to be an asshole in order to be stern and truthful. Plenty of people in this thread have given me their advice without being disrespectful. I’m so sick of this “tough love” meme.

Why don’t you kiss my @ss and get the fu¢k out of my thread, okay? Why waste your time if you aren’t going to be helpful?

Huh, that’s an interesting take on the matter. I’ll have to check our more Patristic writings.