What do you do when you feel like it is basically you alone with your sin against the whole world? I am at university, i don't know a single person who can relate to me an my faith. I have fallen into sin and haven't been to confession in over a month and haven't been to Church in 3 weeks. I don't want to go to Church because i'm ashamed of my sin in part, and in part if feel like i just go there and then leave and it goes back to me vs the world again. I don't want to go to confession because i get some advice from my priest but then i have to leave and i go back to this battleground where i'm surrounded by enemies in a fight which seems hopeless, and so i fall quick, and then back to confession, rinse and repeat. I feel like just stopping going to church till i finish university and can move to a place where i won't be entirely alone.
Apologies for the blog post but i'm really just utterly lost and have no idea what to do.
Alone?
Confess to us, and you will be forgiven.
For the third time … have you considered the idea that it's not all about you?
God has a unique personal relationship with him. OP is a VIP in God's book. It is very much all about him.
That's how the struggle goes OP. Keep doing spiritua warfare. Repentance is the most important tool we have in our disposal. Even if you sin 100,000 times, each time make repentance.
have we spoken? i think you may have me confused with someone else. You might be right though, what do you mean when you say it isn't all about me?
I'm in a similar situation, but I bite my teeth together and resist the evil world. Remember that there are others like you, in ancient times but also in modern. Strait is the gate.
Also don't forget to pray.
Remember that there is only one person who will use shame to keep you from church. Satan is doing all he can to destroy and sounds like it is working. Go to church, go to confession, reinsert yourself into the fold of the church and you will become aware of the mercy of Christ. I'll say it again because it bears repeating: Satan is the only one who doesn't want you to go to church! Therefore receive confession! pray faithfully; for mercy and rescue from your despair! Christ gives freely to those who ask!
well that's more or less the most unchristian response you were able to give
There aren't any people at your church you can fellowship with? These are your family now, you shouldn't only see them when you come together for worship but you should see them more often, especially since you're struggling with loneliness.
Humility is your best friend. Don't think you're strong enough to face the world alone, even the monastics live in communities. We were made for each other after all.
I'll pray for you.
Not really that is part of the problem, i have to travel to another town every week to go to Church. It would be easy if i had a car, but i don't.
Maybe there are people at church who live closer to you, you should find out. Maybe there's a christian club you can join at university. At any rate you should continue to make your efforts. Get a car, if you can't get one right now just put your nose in the books until you can.
Another option is to share your faith with others. Maybe there's not so many people who are as far away from your values as you think.
Most importantly, pray to God for help.
Then travel. There is no excuse not to go to church.
I can relate, I also am that quiet stoic anime girl who's actually lonely but doesn't want to admit it.
At least go to Liturgy, my man. You don't need to be fully active in community if university sucks your time away, like it does with me, but do go to Liturgy. Now I'm at my summer break and I'm spending it by burning my to-read list and subtitling Orthodox documentaries. If you are as well, try doing the same.
The more depraved our secular lives become the more striking the liturgical beauty is, please don't stop going to it.
I too feel that the fight is hopeless and that the end is near.
So let's pretend we did know for a fact that all is lost, which I believe we can not know for certain. Constantine XI, when he realized the turks had breached the wall, tore off his imperial regalia (so he could fight to the death) and ran head first into the wall breach. I think this is what a Christian must do in a lost scenario, just attack of the dead men it. Because, for one, you will never know for certain that all is lost, And two: if it is, fighting is STILL the correct thing to do.
The real cold water is not it being lost, it's that our lives won't be flashy and remembered. Accepting that is very humbling. Ours most likely will be a life of failed expectations and anonymity. We must keep on with all our might, however little it is. It's the life we must choose.
This is literally me. What helps me is praying the rosary every day and reading the Bible. I needed to transfer from my old university to this new one due to a very traumatic experience that I think almost made me schizophrenic. I left all my friends behind on the old city and was alone on a place I knew nothing about while struggling with my own mind. I put all my faith in God and less than 6 months I'm doing much better now. Trust him and ask him. Do not be ashamed. Humility comes before honor. We can fall, but we must always get up again and our Lord is always helping us.
Also, I try to learn prayers in Latin and I say the vade retro satana formula when I think I'm being tempted.
I know this suffering all too well.
Fixate yourself on Christ's unconditional mercy for you. He knows your heart, your weakness, and the temptations crowding around you. He knows what it's like to be surrounded by temptation. Though He never felt any temptation within, He absolutely understands why you feel it within and why you fall to it. He saw every sin you would commit against Him. All of them. So much that He sweat blood from His pores just thinking of them before the scourge, thorns, and nails ever came close. He willingly took your sins upon Himself. When He was on that cross, His Sacred Heart was filled with love at the thought of you attaining salvation. He thought about you in this moment at university alone without a friend in the faith. Don't stop going to Mass. Don't stop going to confession. Don't ever think you should abstain from the Mass and the sacraments. Keep going. You may fail many times, but don't give up.
“Enter by the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is easy, that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many." (Matthew 7:13)
You don't want to go because it hurts to enter the narrow gate. It hurts for all of us. Especially, when so many around you seem at ease and happy to enter the wide gate. They are slaves to sin just as you and I, but they happily wear their chains and ask for heavier ones. We are always threatened of being weighed down by a multitude of chains. We avoid so many of them, but that one chain that seems inescapable. Everyone has that one. It seems like it's magnetic; attracting chains of increasing weights. Fixate on the Lord's unconditional mercy for you. He sees your heart. He sees you trying. Keep going. I'll be praying for you.
Odd description but I keep coming back to your post for some reason. Maybe it is because of the mention of failed expectations or the life we must choose. Maybe it is the mentioning of being humbled. I am not quite sure but I definitely could use that level of faith and passion you are experiencing. God Bless you for your words.
A turning point for me was realizing my self-pity was a distorted form of pride. I see a lot of young men on the Internet with the same problem as I did, and still do but to a lesser degree.
There is nothing a tree can do to deserve sunlight. There is also nothing a tree can do to not receive it. What a tree does, by its very nature, is cooperate with sunlight, otherwise it perishes. In it, it flourishes.
Likewise, there is nothing we can do to deserve help. There is also nothing we can do to not receive it. What we must do is cooperate with God's help, otherwise we perish. In it, we flourish.
pls go to liturgy.
this has helped thank you user
same boat man. I had been going to church by myself for 4 years and never fit in or made friends (being 50 years younger than everyone doesn't help). Trying different churches didn't help. Got tired of it and quit going.
inb4 >being this prideful.
Atleast continue to read the bible or fellowship online or something. Some of the best friends i've made online were anons i've met on this board.
Can't you Catholics just stay in your own thread?
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this
i feel you bro. it sucks being alone (physically at least) against the world, but thats just how it is. no one gives a winnie the pooh sadly, but don't let that keep you from making it.
its like trying to start a fire by rubbing two sticks together instead of using a lighter. it will take you a very long time and it will be very hard to do, but it is possible. once you have the fire tho, its easy to spread it. people who got their fire from someone else, usually their parents, are very lucky and don't realize how hard it is for firelets, which is why they don't give us a light. but once you grind and grind and finally have your own fire, then you can be a bro and light up some firelets for them. thats how i see it at least
The fire rises.
go to church and receive absolution in the sacrament of confession
When you are praying alone, and your spirit is dejected, and you are wearied and oppressed by your loneliness, remember then, as always, that God the Trinity looks upon you with eyes brighter than the sun; also all the angels, your own Guardian Angel, and all the Saints of God. Truly they do; for they are all one in God, and where God is, there are they also. Where the sun is, thither also are directed all its rays. Try to understand what this means.