I'm agnostic and tend to stay more on the gnostic side

There is. But I'm not on it
Send me an invite here please : lurker#4809

It's more that I don't want to follow the life that everyone seems to follow, that is be a good goy, enter college, get a job, get a wife, work 40 years, save for retirement, consume, get a house, get two kids, get a car, travel every year.

It seems more to me like propaganda of the cold war era than a worhwhile life.
It seems to me that current modern day is empty and leaves me with no satisfaction.

My dream is to make art, and I wanna make games, but I want to make good games, like I'm reading and learning to do everything and I dream to make a game as beautiful as shakespeare works or beethoven music, not the garbage the industry makes nor the shit indies make.

It seems everyone consider games as cheap materialistic entertainment for manchildren and to make a quick buck.

I wanna change that and be a genius making games that could rival the best other art mediums has ever made.

That's my life dream and I'm trying to pursuit it, but I still feel empty spiritualy, so I'm considering to start working on my life and try to live a virtuos life, I started to lurk /fit/ and over time I realized I'm trying to follow a christian life, at least the true christian life that requires effort and sacrifice, not he lukewarm average christian life.

I do hope someone gives us an invite to the christian discord.

You will grow wiser with time user and become more acquainted with God, but you will not be admitted into Heaven unless you are a member of Christ's Church.
youtu.be/LIshZuj5Bqk

I'm already baptized and took the first communion, but more because that's the tradition of my country rather than me choosing to do that.

Not sure if I belong to the church of christ even after more than 15 years of never going to mass.

A question, is posting in tears, like I feel a sudden urge of emotion posting this, like when you feel miserable and is telling some sad experience that makes you cry, evidence of jesus?

I do feel sad thinking about how miserable is my life and how miserable is modern day life and my eyes wanna tear a bit.

Look, I'm afraid you haven't understood Christianity, you can't "pay your way" into heaven with any of those outward things. This seems cruel to those who can't believe, but it's really not because we've all committed so many sins as to be totally unable to repay our debt or normalize our balance of payments. Jesus' message wasn't just to "be nice" it was to rely on Him as an atonement for our faults. None of us will be perfect enough in this lifetime to merit eternal life. But this is a good thing, because if you continue on the path you're on, sooner or later you would become proud of your austerities, your charity and all your accomplishments, and pride is the chief spiritual sin next to rebellion. You would come to believe that you had conquered sin with your strength of will alone, which is impossible, so you must be deceiving yourself and you will pay dearly for self-deception and pride when you finally are judged.

In short, no, you can't go it alone, but fortunately you haven't been placed in a position where you really do have to repay God a good thing for every bad thing you've ever done, it would end in legalism and impossible suffering in an attempt to reach an impossible goal. Even if it were possible, it would lead to a very very miserable existence unlike a loving God would want for his creatures, no matter how sinful they are. Also with faith you can crush such minor sins underfoot.

The good news is that "faith" doesn't require your strenuous belief in things you cannot intellectually justify. In fact don't take my word for it, you can discover the truth by acting as if you believed. As CS Lewis says, don't start by trying to bring yourself certainty that "God must exist" start by asking what you might do if you loved God and your neighbour, and then go do those things, read up a bit on your religion and what people before you have thought when you are unsure. Just proceed honestly and pretty soon you'll be given bit by bit, confirmation of the rightness of Jesus Christ's thesis about life. Of course, one sort of remains agnostic about God as an abstract idea, but that just means you have to do some more reading.

Also I hear often the idea that "I just can't believe" but I promise you it's nonsense. Once you know what faith is really like, you won't find it nearly as implausible. In fact you'll probably be greatly relieved that God isn't a meanie that places impossible cognitive burdens on people. My internal monologue isn't "God-God-God, it's more like, "give that homeless man some money, because you could just as easily be him" or "I'm distressed at the lack of community where I live" or any number of things I know I should be doing as a good Christian. It's not about God so much, it's more about learning to care deeply, and ironically given how Christians are portrayed as being unquestioning, I question everything that contradicts my faith.

Everyone belongs in the pew. user, if you seek understanding you shall be granted it. I was once a miserable agnostic as well, but I humbled myself and asked for understanding and it was granted me with time.

It is evidence of the Lord working in your life. He is calling you to Him. When I look back on my life I see the many instances in which the Lord has saved me from myself and has always been luring me closer to Him. Even when he allows me to sin He does so that through my suffering He may bring good out of it. The Good Shepherd never abandons a lost sheep, though when the sheep is found the Good Shepherd breaks its legs so that He has to carry it on His shoulders until they heal and the sheep learns the Good Shepherd's voice. I'll pray for you, user.

I'm afraid my faifth is not enough, It's like being a manlet.

I wanna find a purpose on my life and I do feel that modernity leaves me with an empty materialist life.

Have you ever read The Confessions? I think it will help you.

Dude, the only way you're going to escape that is with reading spiritual books, CS Lewis is a good starting point, "Mere Christianity" is the book, but the other anons will know more titles than me.

"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the father except through me." - Jesus, John 14:6

You won't stop sinning, though, and you know that. You're not a "good person", and you won't earn your way into the kingdom of God, because that's not how it works.
You're a sinner. You need God's help.

OP, I think you have a good heart and God sees it. Read the Bible with the Eyes of God and truly believe what the Bible is saying, don't fall for the enemies lies. God bless.

Attached: bible.png (800x800, 19.02K)

Hey brother, I'll pray for you

God doesn't care if you live frugally or not. Giving to charities is good, but you should live as God allows you, in the sense that you don't live in gluttony, but that you can say you're blessed. And you keep this attitude whether you live in a box, or if you live in some upscale island in Greece. God will call you to your purpose when youre ready, and since he gave you whatever you have, you must accept and be glad in it also being taken away. See it as a season, if you will.

Also, no one alive except Jesus was/is good enough for heaven. Only due to God's grace do we have any kind of shot to get there

Your an edgy child, user.
By the end, you'll want only to follow the life that everyone seems to follow, that is be a good boy, enter college, get a job, get a wife, work 40 years, save for retirement, consume, get a house, get two kids, get a car, travel every year.
Your crap hedonism will start to weigh you down once you see your art is worthless and you're unable to make your games.

It's on the first thread, user.

discord.gg/WJbCkG8

Why would he want something that nobody wants?

The gnostic side isn't believing more in God.
Gnosticism is a completely different thing.

I concur. I spent the majority of my younger life following after such self seeking garbage. For many years I was lost in the Gnostic swamp. Presently, I regret the choices I made when I was younger and had a desire to make my own rpgs. However being a good boy and feeding the system which increasingly looks like the one in Revelations 13 doesn't seem all that great either. Maybe the Amish were right after all.

God has given us express instructions on how to live. If you choose not to follow these instructions in life, preferring your ways to His (and therefore separating yourself from Him), then you will be given that after death as well.

Do you think giving a few dollars here and there and not doing anything terrible is worthy of the reward of eternal paradise? It's one thing to think that kind of life doesn't deserve punishment, but to think it deserves an infinitely huge reward?
Or you can believe and accept it as a gift you don't deserve.

No. There must be Baptism, Repentance, and following of the Commandments.

Repentance in the modern sense is "you feel bad and apologize, ur saved!". Repentance in the full sense of Scripture is fixing your life towards God, approaching Heaven as a foot-race, with fear and trembling.

sure, those count as almsgiving. there is no minimum or maximum set to almsgiving.

Who knows? No one can know whether they will go to to Heaven.

I tend to be on the side where I hope for the salvation of pretty much every human. I hope that He will see how imperfect each of us are and judge us accordingly; only letting those get away who, thru both belief and action, completely separated themselves from Him and everything good during their lives. You can't force anyone into Heaven, after all. Hell does remain a real possibility.

Of course, you would be better off if you at least made a sincere attempt at a leap of faith. Remember that He wants you to join Him.

As Benedict XVI said of purgatory:

This user has wisdom.

Wrong.

Take the pascal wager. What could go wrong?

It would. Christ demands that you believe that He is God, that He was born a man, and He died was resurrected for the forgiveness of your sins. You seem like you're at least part of the way there already, why don't you try to "make yourself" believe in Christ?

Attached: dont do that.png (877x654, 272.55K)

He won't as you are a reprobate. It is impossible to enter heaven without the catholic faith. Read the athanasian creed.

You are too proud hence why you masturbate. Stop masturbating and you'll have a chance at receiving supernatural faith.