Hey Zig Forums...

Hey Zig Forums, if you were possibly going to jail for 6 months up to 1 year or more…what version of The Bible would you take with you to read? I really like Orthodoxy more than anything, perhaps you could point me in the right direction? I'd sure like something in written word to pass the time if I were in such a situation.

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The NAB.

NIV

Care to spell it out for me there? I am Apostate, not a Christian.

Get you an OSB (Orthodox study Bible)
And remember OP
don't drop the soap

Alright, thanks and don't worry nobody does that kind of shit in county (read: jail, not prison) unless they want their asses kicked and ribs stomped into jelly. :)

Here some good translations

King James Version

Revised Standard Version

English Standard Version

Something important though whichever Bible you go for make sure it includes the Apocrypha, if you are an American a lot of bibles you see in stores/given for free wont have this, and for things like the King James you might even have to purchase a separate book to have it. So when looking at the Index make sure it includes the books in this image.

Avoid the Good News and the New World translations at all costs. The first has been simplified to the extent it looses meaning and the latter is a political edition made by the Jehovas Witnesses who deny the Trinity and edit the bible accordingly to push this point.

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I've never even heard of this, but now I have it. Thank you, man.

Tobit and Sirach are great.

Lol, I forgot there was a difference. But since you like the Orthodoxy, if they allow you other reading material you should check out pic related.
God forbid you end up in actual prison but if you do treat it as if you were a desert father out in the harsh wilderness.
Its the story of Valeriu Gafencu an Iron Guard Legionarie that was captured by the (((communists))) and was subjected to unspeakable torture. Despite all of the wickedness they did to him he never lost faith and actually ended up converting alot of the prisioners into Christians (communists and all). He turned the prision into a monastery and is hailed as a martyr

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I'd want an accurate but easy to read translation (you can't Google words or verses you don't understand while in jail), so the KJV wouldn't be ideal unless you're very familiar with it. I'd personally go for the RSV2CE, however in your case, I believe the Orthodox Study Bible would be more appropriate.

OSB is nice in that the notes always point back to Christ. But it lacks 4 Maccabees and 2 Esdras.
NRSV has the whole Eastern Orthodox canon, not a bad choice for personal reading.
NKJV is obviously the classic but you'll miss on a lot of scriptures that aren't included.

Honestly if I had to go to prison I would just take my Bible (in French, the TOB) and the 4 volumes of the Philokalia translated in English so far.

I see…can I ask what you think about Serbia in the 1990's? What side are you on?

Kek, don't worry about it. The truth is they probably wont let me take any materials into jail. However, I wouldn't mind some reading material when I take my hermitage after my time is up.

Tbh, I don't know much about the YugoSlav wars other than the memes that are associated with Serbia.

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Based

Excellent

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Pidgin

But…I live alone?

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Oh, sweet! It's today's edition of "Bible Fight"!

NIV means new international version

I and I will show you the way to everliving peace while you in the clutches of babylon my brother

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Orthodox here, but KJV. As much as I like the OSB, it's notes are goofy at times. I prefer no notes at all rather than have one thing taint a bible.

Orthodoxy based as always.

They quote the fathers alot, I'd hesitate to call that 'goofy'. The New Testament of the OSB is NKJV anyway.

OP, can you request a priest visit? I'd do that if I were in your shoes, discussion is as good as reading. But I'd also go with the OSB as I noted above for a Bible, it has icons in it as well.

Just curious, do they not provide religious literature in jails and prisons in your country? Around here you can bring in any book you like, but you it must remain behind when you get out (unless it is your religion's sacred text). I realize this is probably not a universal practice, but I'd still expect that most countries (at least those that are nominally Christian) would provide a copy of the Bible to those in jail.

I'm the user there.

Some of the stuff is harmless, but goofy nonetheless. Like the size for Goliath in the Septuagint is stated as "4 cubits" (about 6'9"). But the Masoretic has him at 6 cubits (9 feet!). The Dead Sea Scrolls and Josephus also have him at 4 cubits. But the OSB notes say "9 feet" (even though the scripture text itself properly translates it as "4 cubits"). So I assume the note writer just put something in there from his standard Masoretic based Protestant scholarship… and didn't even read the actual Septuagint. This is the definition of "goofy".

But that's "harmless". There are more harmful forms of goofiness. Like giving the late date for the Exodus (1200s.. rather post 1400s BC). This kind of thing was from mainline Protestants who cast doubt on the historicity of the Bible.. because shifting the timelines has now made it impossible to synchronize with Egyptian history. And they can play dumb and say "we don't see any achaeological evidence for an actual Exodus" and have written it off as a myth for the past 50 years. It's true that there is no evidence for an entry into Israel in the 1200s (but there IS evidence for earlier, more traditional dating). Well meaning Christians like these Orthodox writers accidentally get entrapped in the Protestant scholarly world, not knowing it was created to destroy trust in the scriptures.

The Bible itself attests in multiple places that it was in the 1400s BC (like in Kings, where it says Solomon built the temple 400 years after Israel entered the promised land. Or in Judges, where one of the leaders says it been 200 years since they entered the promised land. Multiple other passages lead to an earlier Exodus date).

So yes, I don't like having crap that doubts the scriptures…. within the very scriptures I'm reading. This is why modern Catholic bibles suck too.. they've been completely duped by modernist interpretations (NAB, for example). Just a hundred years ago, the Douay Rheims notes were fairly based.

Lastly, you can read better stand alone commentaries, or directly from the Church fathers.

First of all the original Hebrew has him at that. Second of all, everyone has the Egyptian at 1 Chronicles 11:23 at five cubits, which is around 8.5 feet tall.

Thirdly, everyone has the giant at 1 Samuel 17:5 whose coat of mail (not counting other armor) weighted 156 pounds and his spear weighed 18.75 pounds.

Fourthly, the Hexaplar Septuagint gives Elhanan as the one who killed Goliath in 2 Samuel 21:19 yet it says it was his brother he killed at 1 Chronicles 20:5. The original Hebrew actually says the same thing in both places, while the Hexaplar Septuagint mistranslated it in the first spot, not understanding the grammar and thus creating a contradiction since David was the person responsible for this.

It's extremely straightforward to show from the Authorized version that the Exodus took place sometime between 1569 and 1547 B.C., if you assume the first year of Cyrus' reign was 539 B.C.

Actually 480 years but yes.

Did you realize the NKJV has many footnotes that cast doubt on the veracity of scripture? For instance at there is a footnote at Mark 16:9 that says "Vv. 9–20 are bracketed in NU as not in the original text."

The NKJV also adds thousands of footnotes throughout the New Testament that give contradictory or opposite meanings. For instance see footnotes at Mark 1:2, Acts 2:30, Acts 8:37, Romans 11:6, Philippians 2:6 (an especially satanic inversion), Colossians 2:18 (omits "not").

Also the NKJV changes Titus 3:10 to contradict Luke 12:51, it adds the word "merely" to 1 Peter 3:3 and the NKJV changes "narrow" to "difficult" in Matthew 7:14. These are just a few examples of the alterations it makes to the original scripture. So bottom line yes, very good choice not to use the NKJV.

I know the original Hebrew does. I said it myself. I'm just saying it's goofy that the note writers followed that, but not the very translation they were writing for. Call me obsessive, but these sort of things annoy me.


Unfortunately, I agree. I think Thomas Nelson originally convinced them to keep the NKJV, but they need a full break and use the Patriarchal/Byzantine text.

I really like the idea of the OSB, but I think it could be so much better. In lieu of that, I'm fine with the KJV/Apocrypha. I have Brenton's LXX to compare readings there as well.

New Revised Standard Version (NRSV). Accurate translation in modern English.

The Message is the only YES tier Bible.

Based and YES YES YES pilled

Such a powerful text. It comes out swinging like no other Bible on page 1, sentence 1.

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I am writhing in pain reading this.

If you like Orthodoxy, get the Orthodox Study Bible, and read and pray the Psalms in it.

Or they could just get a plain Bible. And a psalter specifically for prayer. It's more of a recent American Evangelical thing to think we need scriptures in these pre-canned forms (and you see how tacky that is). Case in point:

Here I thought I was being harsh for pointing out some errors in the notes of the OSB. I clearly give Zig Forums too much credit.