Please don't do that user. Consorting with demons is not the answer, ever. God has noticed you. As another user stated read Job. Reading seems to be something you enjoy. Keep doing it. Find other things you enjoy. If you have family, spend more time with them and please, go to church or at most, see a priest.
God Is Ignoring Me Please Help
Jonathan Sanchez
Cooper Barnes
Absolutely based. Vid related to the thread.
Carson Kelly
And because I love you OP, i'm going to say a prayer for you and ask St. Joseph (the terror of demons, guardian of the church, pic related) to pray for you too.